Oh, those wacky conservatives. You see the kind of crap they believe? Largely trivial actor Kirk Cameron is now actively speaking out against The Theory of Evolution and the devil-book Origin of Species.

And in true conservative fashion, he is using nothing but bad arguments, including linking Darwin to pro-eugenics movements, Nazism, and other bad things. Blah, blah, blah.

Folks, the Czar will explain two things here: first, that Cameron represents a very small percentage of conservatives—mostly centered in the South—who reject the reality of Evolution, and frankly, a whole bunch of other things. It is possible to be conservative and evangelical—it is also possible to be conservative and not evangelical, which seems create a Does Not Compute klaxon in liberal brains.

While liberals love to laugh at the foolishness of some conservatives, they have a pretty good share of thrashing skeletons in their own closet.Second, and a more interesting point, is that while liberals love to laugh at the foolishness of some conservatives, they have a pretty good share of thrashing skeletons in their own closet.

Take HuffPo’s own darling Frank Lipman, who believes swine flu vaccinations are dangerous compared to his own homeopathic advice. If you cannot bring yourself to go to the HuffPo link, you can safely click here to see that Dana Ullman makes equally bad recommendations based on magic and hidden powers.

Let us see which side is more idiotic. Creationists who deny evolution—and therefore deny the necesity of supplemental vaccination (although they do not realize this is their argument), or New Age furballs who advise against vaccination because it goes against natural healing practices? Both have the same result—sick people not getting vaccinated.

And we need not even go into the pablum-excreting feel-good madness that is Deepak Chopra.

Bottom line: Evolution is. It can be demonstrated at all levels, and every objection to it can be taken apart in minutes by self-study. Even the moral objections to it can be disarmed by someone reading Darwin and discovering that he was not a eugenicist nor a member of the Nazi party. What Darwin represents is a threat to the evangelical house of cards that makes up their reality. Another matter for another time.

But to portray this mentality as inherent to conservatism is not only incorrect, it is also self-damning, since liberals suffer a much broader range of lunatic ideas, from crystals to chakra powers to astral projection to PETA. Conservatives, per usual, admit and accept criticisms leveled to us about some of our members. Liberals, however, tend to deny their own mishaps so prominently on display.

So if you are considering jumping onto the Kirk Cameron Is An Ass bandwagon, don’t bother until you have cleaned up your own magic shop of madness.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.