Hey, you likely ask yourself, if you guys have been around so long, how come there are never any old pictures of yourselves? Actually, there are many! But our Royal Archivist is still rummaging through thousands of boxes in the … Continue reading →
Dr. J. apologizes for the delay in posting this missive addressed to the Czar but forwarded to Dr. J. from the one and only Uncle Jay: Dear Dread & Awful.: A vast smoke screen, wasn’t it? This whole Polar Votrex … Continue reading →
Well, we Gormogons love infighting. Watching the playful shoving match between Dr. J., GorT, and Volgi over the metric system is a strong reminder to you readers that we Castle men do not march in lockstep. Each of the Czar’s … Continue reading →
Today, thanks to time travel, we were able to hold our First Annual Turkey Contest yesterday. And the results were about what you would expect. As you know, all of us Gormogons are superlative cooks in at least one area … Continue reading →
The other day, we all received one of the best question we have ever received. The Czar makes this claim because all six of us were quite excited by the nature of the question: To the Gracious, Learned, Infallible, and … Continue reading →
“To desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly.” – Confucius It applies in chemistry and it applies in real life. Dr. J.
Continue reading →Some five years ago, the internal deliberations of the Gormogons were made public on a “blog.” After executing those responsible, we decided to make lemonade of the lemons life handed us. With the blood of the minions responsible. (Dgapo the … Continue reading →
Happy Fathers Day to all of our readers who are fathers or who have fathers! Let’s take a look around Castle Gormogon to see what the Fathers Day Fairy brought your Gormogon Overlords, Fathers to All, muah ha ha ha … Continue reading →
You had no idea they were Democrats, didja? ŒV: Good God. RT @heminator: If you’re an ivy league educated woman, motherhood makes you a traitor to feminism? bit.ly/11xjqLL— The Gormogons (@Gormogons) April 23, 2013 Your Gormogons in recent days have been discussing … Continue reading →
The middle-aged Sith Lord would retort, “I won’t cut the blanket, simply cover my feet when its cold and my head when its bright. .” Dr. J. actually likes Daylight Savings Time. Your Gormogons don’t always agree with each other, … Continue reading →
From time to time, a number of the Gormogons get together for various efforts. Here is what happens when you combine the Volgi’s penchant for yeti, Mandy’s orbiting satellite control systems, and GorT’s robots: I guess we need to find … Continue reading →
Volgi’s…maybe… Dr. J.
Continue reading →Happy Thanksgiving from your Gormogon Overlords! Rather than gather in the castle feast hall, we travel to points hither and yon to break bread with family. Nevertheless, it is wondered It is often wondered what the Gormogons make for Thanksgiving Dinner: Volgi: … Continue reading →
Our beloved Operative B.G. posted this in the personals section of the New Atlantis Lefty Arts Weekly Paper: Esteemed and Exalted Gormogons, Although my wife and I are among the half of Americans who pay taxes so the other half … Continue reading →
Gentle Readers, Your Gormogons are gearing up for tonight’s Halloween Party at the Castle. Dr. J. only felt it appropriate to share with you, our readers and fans, how we will be dressing for the festivities. Dr. J. your Royal … Continue reading →
孔夫子 a.k.a. Confucius, our Œcumenical Volgi (the Notorious ŒV) has been conspicuously absent of late, especially given that he wrote the first post on our esteemed website. Well, the first in a wibbly, wobbly, timey-wimey sort of way, anyway. Well, Dr. J.’s dark … Continue reading →
Now, you understand, this is not the Volgi singing. It is, however, Roy Wood. And it gives you a weird idea of why Volgi would never do his own rock video. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный … Continue reading →
Man, you people get so needy. All right. By popular demand, we have added a second series of MiniFigures for your Castle Gormogon sets! Die-hard fans will be certain to gouge other people’s eyes out in order to get their … Continue reading →
Admit it! Wouldn’t you sometimes rather act out your own Gormogon posts, rather than read the ones we actually put here? Seriously, don’t you just want to go all ‘Puter on NPR once in a while? Or have the Czar … Continue reading →
Fantastic work by GorT on the statistical analysis of our writings. The Czar is bemused when looking at his own word cloud that “DON” appears there in the far right. To wear? A mafia figurehead? A Spanish lord? Ameche? Curious, … Continue reading →
GorT loves him some math and statistics. So I felt it was time to run the numbers on our corner of the internet here. The numbers are based on a snapshot of the blog from a few days ago. I … Continue reading →
This is the closest image ‘Puter could locateto show the true beauty of his first car. In or about 1985, the State of Maryland (“America in Miniature“**) issued ‘Puter his driver’s license. From that fateful day forward, ‘Puter was unleashed … Continue reading →
Hey, look what Volgi has EmilyG doing at the Castle! The Czar doesn’t get this stuff, but has to admit this is a neat trick. We need to get pictures of what happened with the lawn darts and bowl of … Continue reading →
Dr. J., Mrs. Dr. J., the Lil Resident and Lil Med Student took in the Avengers at the local theatre on Sunday after mass. Dr. J. was looking forward to this movie for quite some time. He was not disappointed. … Continue reading →
Volgi has a cat, does he not? Also, you should know that Mandarin actually smiled at this. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of … Continue reading →
The Volgi sends this interoffice memo: To: Dr. J.From: Confucius, The Oecumenical Volgi, (The Notorious OEV).RE: MCAT ChangesDear Dr. J.:MCAT changes: More NAMS or fewer Tiger Cubs? LinkWhat do you think is going on here? Best, Volgi Dear Volgi, Terrific … Continue reading →
Dr. J. was inspired by Kevin Williamson’s Friday column at National Review Online. He posits that Republicans are divided into two camps. Those that believe that Obama is incompetent, and those that believe that he is evil. It his his … Continue reading →
With everybody back at the Castle, the Czar thought he would stroll around and see what everyone was doing. And then, just like that, the Czar thought he would poll around about New Year’s resolutions. We wandered down to the … Continue reading →
Confucius, our Œcumenical Volgi (The Notorious ŒV) is kicking his Christmas tree old school style. He is sporting a traditional Cantonese money tree. This tree is typically brought out by single Chinese individuals for the Chinese Spring Festival. Red envelopes are … Continue reading →
Now, the Czar has been our Minister of Substantive Posts™ of late, with ‘Puter hideously busy dealing with all things reality based, and GorT, Volgi, and Dr. J. being all Christmassy with our content, and Mandy, well, being Mandy. But … Continue reading →
The Volgi drew Day 3 on the advent calendar. He’s not one to get up early so the rest of us waited for him to come down to the Castle common room. He excitedly opened the four-foot doors on the … Continue reading →
Dr. J. is wondering when the Founding Gormos will be returning to the castle. The Czar’s mail is piling up. The machine that goes ping in Mandy’s lab stopped going ping. We’re out of yeti Food for Volgi’s pet, and … Continue reading →
A couple of letters came in in response to Dr. J.’s post regarding ADHD. First, Operative FJR writes in: Dr.J, Read your list of ADHD symptoms and realized I don’t know anyone in the construction industry that doesn’t exhibit those … Continue reading →
Let us see. Volgi is hiding up in his quarters with that goofy Yeti of his, watching another Sonny Chiba movie on Beta. Yeah, he sits there with his iPad now, Twittering all day. Averages about 800 tweets a day, … Continue reading →
Ordinarily, on a holiday like Memorial Day, you get a lecture about how good you have it, and how you should be remembering all those lost lives rather than going out and partying. Not this year, though. Instead, with this … Continue reading →
A typical email, but one we chose because it seems really flattering: Do my eyes deceive me, or is there new wallpaper in the background on the blog? What is it, and who picked it out? It looks very nice … Continue reading →
Şɵ ʛøɾŤ שׂɾɨʈēʂ ʊק ʈħɨʂ ɳēשׂ קɨēçē øʄ ʂøʄʈשׂăɾē ħē ɕăɭɭʂ ɤøɭğɨɳɨʑēɾ, שׂħɨçħ ʈɾăɳʂʄøɾɱʂ ўøʊɾ ʈēϰʈ ʈɵ ɭøøк ɭɨкē ʂøɱēʈħɨɳğ ʈħē ɤøɭğɨ ɱɨğħʈ ħăɤē שׂɾɨʈʈēɳ. Ťħē ʂøʄʈשׂăɾē ɨʂ קɾēʈʈў ɳēăʈ; ʈħē ɕʑăɾ ɾăɳ ɨʈ ħēɾē, ăɳɖ ɨʈ ɭøøкʂ קɾēʈʈў ğøøɖ. … Continue reading →
So look what the Volgi dug up in the basement. It’s from a 1954 issue of Collier’s magazine. Yep, before all the global cooling… wait, global warming… heck, now it’s cooling again… began. Do your Gormogons believe in man-made climate … Continue reading →
As you know, the Gormogons have many, many secret and special projects under way at any given moment. Some are so important, that we trust them not even to our favorite underlings. The Volgi, for example, returned from the 8th … Continue reading →
Every ultra-secret society needs an easy-to-find website. And it is the one-year anniversary of this one! As a way of celebrating, here’s a simple user guide to most things Gormogon. Learn More About Us Although the Gormogons claim roughly five … Continue reading →
So, yeah, your Œc. Vol. visited the Czar’s domains yesterday, and we had a nice time, or at least so thought Confucius*. The Czar seems to have been baffled by the Volgi’s pronunciation of “Volgi,” or as the Volgi would … Continue reading →
Moments after the Czar pre-apologized to all of you that the Mandarin and your Volgi would be unable to post for a day, the two of them elected to mess with the Czar and put up some substantive posts. It … Continue reading →
Let’s see what’s going on in the world here. Here’s one: the people of Ghana, a country not often in the news, have some reason to celebrate. The Dutch are finally going to return the head of Badu Bonsu II … Continue reading →
