↓
 

The Gormogons

Home→Categories Mailbag 1 2 3 4 5 >>

Category Archives: Mailbag

Post navigation

← Older posts

Mailsatchel…sack…bag….Whatever

The Gormogons Posted on May 20, 2015 by GorTMay 20, 2015

Two emails in the delivery chute today: Mark Spahn took a break from emailing the Czar to step up his game and email yours truly, the shiny robot.  (“Suck it, Czar” shouts ‘Puter from the Rumpus Room couch): Dear GorT, … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, Mark Spahn

Sci Fi Interoffice Memo

The Gormogons Posted on August 18, 2014 by GorTAugust 18, 2014

GorT received the following interoffice memo from Dr. J regarding the Science Fiction TV show countdown: GorT,I’ve enjoyed your commentary on the top 50 Sci-Fi shows as ranked by people other than us.I’d like to share a few of my … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, Science Fiction, This TV show really sucks

SciFi TV Mailbag

The Gormogons Posted on August 11, 2014 by GorTAugust 11, 2014

The esteemed Borepatch writes in regarding Torchwood on the list: Two Borepatch household thumbs up on Torchwood. It’s interesting that this is a Dr. Who spin off with frequent gunfire, and also interesting that Captain Jack is American. Even in … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag

SciFi TV Mailbag

The Gormogons Posted on August 4, 2014 by GorTAugust 4, 2014

Greetings, oh shiny one. I am minion #462.5, and I normally report to the Czar (may his shoes remained tied, and verily, not unto each other). I have been perusing the list of sci-fi shows, and it saddened me that … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag

Automated Mailbag

The Gormogons Posted on July 17, 2014 by GorTJuly 17, 2014

GorT got this delivered via the autonomous mail delivery system we have here at the Castle…mostly because the denizens of the moat don’t play nice with our regular postal carrier. We love our postal carriers, but it’s pretty hard to … Continue reading →

Posted in GorT, Mailbag

Mailbag

The Gormogons Posted on July 9, 2014 by GorTJuly 9, 2014

It’s been a while since GorT has done a mailbag dump (man, that sounds like something ‘Puter would say). Item 1 – maybe shockingly to the Czar, Borepatch writes into the silver robot with the followin: Great writeup. I completely … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, 'Puter ain't always right, Mailbag, The Czar of Muscovy

Mailbag: Spooky Vets Edition

The Gormogons Posted on April 21, 2014 by Dr. J.April 21, 2014

Gentle Readers, the Retired Spook writes: Dear Dr. J., Thought you might find this story interesting. Tuesday night, I got home from work to find that only one of the horses had showed up for feeding, so I grabbed a … Continue reading →

Posted in Loki J., Mailbag | Tagged Lady J., Loki J., Mailbag, Retired Spook

Mailbag – Printer’s Alley

The Gormogons Posted on April 1, 2014 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Operative RKB Writes regarding Dr. J’s recent post: Dear Dr. J.:  False premise: substantial numbers of government documents are printed with inkjets  False minor premise: Of those documents printed on inkjet printers, the text to graphic ratio amounts for a … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Phoney Science, Printing

Stuff and Such

The Gormogons Posted on March 4, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

We have been quite busy, it seems, because so many of you are asking after our various secret projects. Island Dweller, who has yet to complete his many assignments (notably, switching the East and West Magnetic Poles), is suspicious about … Continue reading →

Posted in Doublewide, Gormogonica, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Retired Spook, South Korea, Texas, Texas-sized trash piles

Male Bag!: Tea Party Rant Feedback Edition

The Gormogons Posted on March 3, 2014 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Vladimir Putin was kind enough to pose shirtless, with a rifle for this installation of ‘Puter’s totally not homoerotic Male Bag. Note, all references to “heavily armed Russians” in Ukraine actually refer to shirtless Vladimir Putin taking Crimea with only … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Tea Party

Bombs Away!

The Gormogons Posted on February 28, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Long-time Operative erc comments: “Operative KH, who is in charge of our moon cratering project“….congratulations, Your Czarness. It’s working! / erc Is it ever! Check out some video: What’s great for the Czar, personally, is not so much the incredible … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Minions, Moon

Cleaning Out the Mailbox

The Gormogons Posted on February 25, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Mail for the Czar today. Operative KH, who is in charge of our moon cratering project, writes in to clarify: Dread Czar, I believe the one who was supposed to be in the truck the LAPD was looking for was … Continue reading →

Posted in Doublewide, Law Enforcement, Mailbag, Media Bias, Shooting, Shooting First, Thailand, Vietnam

Shootouts and Training

The Gormogons Posted on February 21, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

A quick followup on a topic that got some serious reads—the anatomy of police shootouts. Your Immensity; I’m well aware of human stress reactions (trying being 17, scared of heights, and being one of two Air Force pukes in Army … Continue reading →

Posted in Firearms, Guns, Law Enforcement, Mailbag, Physiology, Retired Spook, Shooting, Shooting First

Shoot Outs

The Gormogons Posted on February 19, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

This little note from the Retired Spook has much to unpack: Your Immensity: A recent news article seems to indicate that 103 rounds were fired by eight officers into a newspaper delivery truck. If memory serves, the range-to-contact was less … Continue reading →

Posted in Firearms, Guns, Law Enforcement, Mailbag, Physiology, Retired Spook, Shooting, Shooting First

Why Of Course Taxpayers Will Foot The Bill For This!

The Gormogons Posted on February 18, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Operative BJ writes in with alarming news: Hey, you in the chair! Operative BJ is happy to have you and you and you pay for him to enjoy his 8-week tanning treatment through your tax dollars. And no, Operative BJ … Continue reading →

Posted in Government Run Healthcare, Health care, Insurance, Mailbag, Medicine, ObamaCare, Operative BJ, Pop Psychology, Psychology, Snow

Lots of Gun News

The Gormogons Posted on February 15, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

A falcon left a dead mouse on our windowsill yesterday. As the Czar went to flick it off the sill down into the guest parking lot, the Czar noticed a small note tied to its leg. Indeed, the note read … Continue reading →

Posted in Birds, Courts, Firearms, Guns, Mailbag, Second Amendment, Supreme Court, The Czar of Muscovy, U.S. Constitution

National Service: Closing Thoughts

The Gormogons Posted on February 13, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller rests his case on national service by linking up Operative BJ’s observations. Most August Majesty: I thought the topic had been laid to rest, however, Operative BJ’s comments are too good to pass up. I couldn’t have expressed … Continue reading →

Posted in Island Dweller, Mailbag, Mandatory Service, Operative BJ, Operative Infighting

Closing Thoughts on Quasi-Non-Drafts

The Gormogons Posted on February 10, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Before we get too far away from the original debate, Operative BJ sent us his closing thoughts about six days ago. But the Czar was busy, you know, what with trying on hats and getting the Castle dormitory television to … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Mandatory Service, Operative Infighting

Truman and Korea

The Gormogons Posted on February 5, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller has some thoughts on the Czar’s mercurial rant on Korea: Most esteemed Czar A close examination of the photo of that poor man on that lonely Korean hilltop will disclose some deep slash wounds on the palm of … Continue reading →

Posted in Communism, Defense spending, Democrats, Harry Truman, Island Dweller, Korean War, Mailbag, Military, North Korea, South Korea, Stupidity

Mailbag – Blasts from the Past

The Gormogons Posted on February 3, 2014 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Operative SMC writes after a stint in deep cover: Dr. J,  It’s been a couple of years since I last wrote: kids can have that effect as I’m sure you know. Bill Vallicella (maverick philosopher) linked to his friend. I’ve … Continue reading →

Posted in Gay Marriage, Gormogon Operatives, Lady J., Loki J., Mailbag, Operative SMC, Retired Spook, Unam sanctam catholicam apostolicam ecclesiam

Harry and Ike

The Gormogons Posted on February 3, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller offers a closing argument for his position on national service: Most esteemed majesty – You are correct in your position what I am proposing re: Universal Military Service is an impossibility at this time. It is impossible because … Continue reading →

Posted in Dwight Eisenhower, Harry Truman, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Mandatory Service, Retired Spook

Korea

The Gormogons Posted on February 2, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

A side-note from another topic prompted the Retired Spook to write this on a cinder block that was chucked through the window and hit Sleestak square in the chest, as if it had been precisely timed and aimed. Retired Spook … Continue reading →

Posted in History, Korean War, Mailbag, Military, North Korea, Retired Spook, South Korea, The ’70s—Nadir of American History

Operative BJ: On Patriotism

The Gormogons Posted on February 2, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar continues to hear back from Operative BJ, Retired Spook, and Island Dweller about national service. Come to think of it, the Czar seems to get a lot of letters from retired guys. The Czar is worried he’s going … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, Mandatory Service, Operative BJ, Patriotism

Round 4!

The Gormogons Posted on January 31, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The ongoing debate about national service is hardly winding down; the Czar is not certain he has seen this much debate between our readers since a row between Operative Thump (deceased), Minion Hoogle (deceased), and Operative Cheever (deceased) in 1838 … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Operatives, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Mandatory Service, Operative Infighting, Retired Spook, Voting

An Extra Wet Male Bag!: Federal Flood Insurance Edition

The Gormogons Posted on January 30, 2014 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Czar takes a break from his taxing hike during the Plateau of Leng’s first and only Pride Parade. The parade was discontinued after a freak rainbow focused the light from our quasar sun, instantly vaporizing all organic material, leaving behind … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter's Always Right, Gormogon Operatives, Gubbamint, Insurance, Mailbag, Suck It Czar

National Service 3, With 3 Thoughts

The Gormogons Posted on January 29, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

For those not keeping pace, we have been having a fun, informative, and delightfully expanding discussion going on here over the idea of mandatory national service. If you are just joining us, please start here and then read this followup. … Continue reading →

Posted in Ghost Stories, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Mandatory Service, Operative Infighting, ScottO

Two Views On National Service

The Gormogons Posted on January 24, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

What’s awesome for all of us is when a good debate begins between two of our loyal readers. You will recall a letter from Island Dweller, in which he supported US Navy ADM Mike Mullen for suggesting a mandatory national … Continue reading →

Posted in Big Government, Government Control, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Mandatory Service, Operative BJ, Operative Infighting

Male Bag: Write Your Congressman Edition

The Gormogons Posted on January 22, 2014 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Who knew Burkina Faso had a Pride Parade? Czar. that’s who. Operative SMR reports in from Upper Volta* where he’s on a super-secret mission for Czar and ‘Puter to discover a new fruit-based mixer to spice up our favorite drink, the … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Suck It Czar, The Czar

Retired Spook Sampler Platter

The Gormogons Posted on January 20, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Retired Spook writes in to follow up on some recent items: Please convey my thanks to Operative BJ for his insightful analysis of the Gates memoir. Although we disagree on a few particulars, he covers the same ground that … Continue reading →

Posted in China, Department of Defense, Global Economy, Hippies…they say they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad, Lyndon Johnson, Mailbag, Retired Spook, Superbowl, Talkin' Football

Mailbag: Dangerous Gates

The Gormogons Posted on January 18, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The media is starting to realize that former Defense Secretary Robert Gates did not do the Democrats any favors with his memoir. Operative BJ wants us to know that Gates, frankly, did no one any favors with his memoir: O … Continue reading →

Posted in Department of Defense, Mailbag, Politics

Male Bag!: ‘Puter’s Tardy In Responding To JAB, Of Doublewide Fame

The Gormogons Posted on January 17, 2014 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

So this is where Czar goes on vacation! ‘Puter’s had a heckuva start to the New Year, what with picking up pieces of year-end 2013 closings at the office, and dealing with back-to-school craziness at home.  In the rush, ‘Puter … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter's Always Right, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Media Bias, New York Times - NYT, Suck It Czar

Re: Re: What Makes a Right?

The Gormogons Posted on January 12, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Operative BJ would like to reply to Operative SMR, which the Czar—because he is a benevolent homicidal maniac Czar—encourages. Getting email from any one of you is rewarding enough, but when the readership starts exchanging ideas, well, then this site … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter's Always Right, Also Suck It 'Puter, Bill of Rights, Constitutional Law, Consumer Rights, Guest Writer, Mailbag, Rant, Rights

What Makes a Need?

The Gormogons Posted on January 9, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Operative BJ brings the heat, taking the Czar’s late-night rant on Rights versus Privileges to an even simpler level of clarity: Great and glorious Czar, I plead forgiveness before asking: Does not the Constitution define the powers of the Federal … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter's Always Right, Also Suck It 'Puter, Bill of Rights, Constitutional Law, Consumer Rights, Mailbag, Rant, Rights

Mailbag for the Lazy Sacks of…

The Gormogons Posted on January 7, 2014 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Feels like 8º F outside – did you check your pipes? GorT settled down enough after his post yesterday morning enough to read his email and found this one from Ghost: Shiny Robot Lord I am sick to death of … Continue reading →

Posted in Liberal Idiots, Mailbag

Smörgåsbord Mail

The Gormogons Posted on January 2, 2014 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

More mail from the masses. Your Majesty, I’m certain you recall my story of the pair of CFL bulbs, where one died after a few weeks and the other was still good? Tonight, the other one died. I found that … Continue reading →

Posted in Island Dweller, Mailbag, Retired Spook, ScottO, Uncle Jay

Glad We’re Focusing on the Economy

The Gormogons Posted on December 29, 2013 by GorTApril 6, 2014

GorT sometimes attends protests Maybe liberals and democrats are focusing on “living wage” arguments so the following doesn’t get much press: A recent CNN poll shows almost 70% of the country believes the economy is generally in poor shape and … Continue reading →

Posted in Economics, Liberal Idiots, Mailbag, Math class is hard, Walmart

Mailbaggage

The Gormogons Posted on December 27, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Christmas stockings were filled with mail here, and the Czar put his unstockinged feet up on the Ottoman to relax rather than respond. Before Mark Spahn, of West Seneca, New York, writes to disabuse the Czar on his capitalization of … Continue reading →

Posted in Island Dweller, Mailbag

Mailbag – Billy the #pajamaboy and Frankie the English Challenged Edition

The Gormogons Posted on December 20, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Quit doodling in the margins and get the translation right! Gentle Readers, Dr. J. got a bunch of mail in the last couple of days. The first was from our friend Mark Spahn. It wasn’t directly to Dr. J. but … Continue reading →

Posted in #pajamaboy, Bad Translations, Billy, Bronies, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Meme, Organizing for America, The Obama Amateur Hour

The Mail Was Light Yesterday

The Gormogons Posted on December 20, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

What fun! Let’s open up the Czar’s mailbox to see what you all have to say. First up, we have Mark Spahn, of West Seneca, New York, with some questions on our lightbulb guide. Thank you, your Czarosity, for [your … Continue reading →

Posted in Energy, Lightbulbs, Mailbag, Math class is hard, ScottO, The Inscrutable Mandarin, Volgi

No Mellow Was Harshed

The Gormogons Posted on December 20, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

A certain retired Master Sergeant wants us to consider how bad things might be. Your Immenseness; At the risk of wearing out my welcome here, I’d like to point out something that my grandfather frequently reminded me to consider; A. … Continue reading →

Posted in Cuba, Mailbag, Michelle Obama, Stupidity, Terrorists, The Obama Amateur Hour

Mailbox – Popalicious Edition

The Gormogons Posted on December 17, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Gentle Readers, The Holy Father, Pope Francis continues to make headlines, what with the Time Man of the Year award and all. LTC Dan (@LTCDanR) writes: Dear Dr. J.,  Thoughts? Comments?,  LTC Dan Dear LTC Dan, Thank you for writing … Continue reading →

Posted in Ayn Rand, Capitalism, Mailbag, Minions, Pope Francis

A Quartet of Letters

The Gormogons Posted on December 16, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar, as usual, picked up a lot of interesting mail over the weekend. Mark Spahn, he of West Seneca, New York, submitted a clever idea about using text-to-speech applications as an inexpensive and highly effective way to proofread materials … Continue reading →

Posted in Billy Jack, Boehner Amateur Hour, Communism, Communist Sympathizers, GorT, Gun control, John Boehner, Mailbag, Multiple-Victim Public Shootings, Requiescat in pace

Estimating a Podesta Munity Destiny

The Gormogons Posted on December 11, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The snow is finally falling here in Muscovy, and the holidays must be fast approaching because all the car commericals on television are written by and for 5-year-olds. Seriously: whoever it was at Honda who greenlit the use of Michael … Continue reading →

Posted in 1990s, Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Island Dweller, Mailbag

The Wages of Spin

The Gormogons Posted on December 9, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Operative MR has been working on a secret project for us, the nature of which shall not be revealed, named Project Shoot Down ISON. She takes time out from her busy schedule to write in. Please note especially her first … Continue reading →

Posted in Business, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Texas, Unions

America’s Pasttime in 27.432 Meter Increments

The Gormogons Posted on December 5, 2013 by GorTApril 6, 2014

GorT’s recent post elicited some interesting responses. First BG writes in regarding flopping and various sports: So basketball and football are better than soccer because the NBA and the NFL are taking steps to deal with the curse of “flopping,” … Continue reading →

Posted in GorT, Imperial Measurements, Mailbag, Math class is hard, Soccer, Talkin' Baseball, Units of Measure

Four-Way

The Gormogons Posted on December 4, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Look, everybody knows the Mandarin is the most popular writer here because he can distill total rage in about three short paragraphs, accompanied by either a funny graphic or some utterly bizarre YouTube video never more than a couple minutes … Continue reading →

Posted in Doublewide, Gormogonica, Island Dweller, Mailbag, MC

The Czar Rants A Bit About A Bad Idea

The Gormogons Posted on December 1, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

JAB, who deep fries even the turkey stuffing, writes in on Thanksgiving: Your Czarness: With Organizing for America sending out talking points for how to promote Obamacare at the family Thanksgiving table, I propose a competition: For every OFA point-spouting … Continue reading →

Posted in Doublewide, Government Run Healthcare, Health care, Mailbag, ObamaCare, Stupid Politicians, Thanksgiving

Plus ça Change

The Gormogons Posted on November 22, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The following essay is a guest post from Island Dweller because it seems the Czar doesn’t post anything of his own lately. But this great news, because we remind our readers that you are welcome to submit your thoughts either … Continue reading →

Posted in Democrats, Financial Crisis, Government Run Healthcare, Guest Writer, Island Dweller, Mailbag, ObamaCare

Male Bag! Extra Sweet Edition

The Gormogons Posted on November 21, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Nothing says “treat us with dignity and respect we deserve” more than dressing up and behaving in accordance with the worst stereotypes about us. Also, these two are playing a game of “hide the sugar beet.” Can you find it? ‘Puter’s … Continue reading →

Posted in Economics, Farmers, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Suck It Czar

Kennedy and Việt Nam

The Gormogons Posted on November 19, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller copies the Czar on some of his mail, which we in turn by our massive grace extend unto thee, dear reader: Your majesty: Esteemed Associate, still firmly ensconced like a tenacious polyp in the bowels of the government … Continue reading →

Posted in Hippies…they say they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad, Island Dweller, John Kennedy, Liberal Idiots, Liberals, Mailbag, Vietnam

Eddie Deezen v. Ezekiel Emanuel

The Gormogons Posted on November 17, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller has some observations: Losing Our Cool, are we? Your immenseness: I had cause to laugh yesterday while watching an out-take from Megan Kelly’s show on FoxNews that featured an interview she attempted with Ezekiel Emanuel, brother of Rahm … Continue reading →

Posted in Government Run Healthcare, Health care, Island Dweller, Liberals, Mailbag, Obama Administration

Mailbag – Force Ghost Edition

The Gormogons Posted on November 15, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

The operative known as Ghost writes to Dr. J., rather than The Czar: O Wielder of the Scalpel Most Fine, I normally write to my overlord who shall not be named, but this…was so…you, that it could not be helped. … Continue reading →

Posted in Bronies, Doctor Who, Dr. J., Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, My Little Pony

Readers Respond

The Gormogons Posted on November 15, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar loves getting mail. But the truth is this: the worse things get out there, the more mail he receives. And we are sad to confess, as you have noticed, the Czar has been getting a lot of mail … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Gormogon Operatives, Island Dweller, Mailbag, ObamaCare

Beating Them At Their Own Game

The Gormogons Posted on November 13, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller brings the 411: Esteemed, great and awful majesty: I recall a recent post by you relating to American voters and how they suck (by and large). Here is a story that’s a perfect example of how voters take … Continue reading →

Posted in Island Dweller, Mailbag, Stupid People, Voting

Ghost and Bangs

The Gormogons Posted on November 12, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Ghost—perhaps our most mysterious operative, although today he was down in the Castle Cafetorium because on Mondays we usually feature that awesome French toast special, where you get two decent scrambled eggs on a separate plate so the syrup … Continue reading →

Posted in Firearms, Gormogon Operatives, Guns, Mailbag, Rifles

Democrats Starting To Worry

The Gormogons Posted on November 3, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller writes (and so should you!): O most dread, awful, omnipotent, omniscent, etc etc . . . Mother Jones magazine recently published the results of a public opinion poll conducted in part by James Carville. The results of the … Continue reading →

Posted in 2014 Election, Democrats, Government Run Healthcare, Island Dweller, Mailbag, ObamaCare, Polls

What Could Go Right?

The Gormogons Posted on November 3, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Sundays are great when other people do our writing for us. Keep the letters inbound, folks! The Czar might have this up even sooner, but he prefers a Windows operating system and lately it takes forever for this thing to … Continue reading →

Posted in Doublewide, Government Run Healthcare, Mailbag, Musicals, ObamaCare

Mailbag

The Gormogons Posted on October 31, 2013 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Operative BG writes in with the following: Never mind the insurmountable ten dollar cost of getting a ride to the library to apply for Obamacare; we’re going to have tons of fun when people try to actually apply. I worked … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, ObamaCare, Operative BG

Now ERRATASTIC…Mailbag – Copy Editor Edition

The Gormogons Posted on October 21, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Operative BG, our copy editor strikes: Just pointing out a peeve of mine. I have many. Dr. J. loves the digital red pen, btw… Also, Spanish emersion? Otherwise, good post. I’m sharing the graph on my Facebook page. Operative BG Essential … Continue reading →

Posted in Grammar, Mailbag, Minions, Operative BG

What We Read

The Gormogons Posted on October 18, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The other day, we all received one of the best question we have ever received. The Czar makes this claim because all six of us were quite excited by the nature of the question: To the Gracious, Learned, Infallible, and … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Dr. J., Gormogon Operatives, GorT, Mailbag, Suck It Czar, The Czar of Muscovy, The Inscrutable Mandarin, Volgi, Volgi (pronounced Volgi)

Secret Messages Decoded

The Gormogons Posted on October 16, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Mark Spahn of West Seneca, NY, is one of our favorite correspondents. It is important to know that this is a cover, because he is technically closer to Lackawanna than he is to the geospatial center of West Seneca. Just … Continue reading →

Posted in Government Run Healthcare, Mailbag, ObamaCare

More Male Bag! ‘Puter Does The Debt Limit Feedback

The Gormogons Posted on October 16, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

‘Puter’s not certain if this is a PrideParade or the Gayest Mardi Gras EverTM, but he likes the color scheme and the horns. Mostly the horns. Operative BG writes in apropos ‘Puter’s piquant five-part series on the nation’s debt limit … Continue reading →

Posted in Congress, Mailbag, National Debt, Rights, U.S. Constitution

Male Bag! Krugman’s A Moronic Partisan Hack Edition (With Added E.J. Dionne!)

The Gormogons Posted on October 16, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Paul Krugman (L) and E.J. Dionne pose fora photo as they take in the sights at ClimaxSprings, Missouri during Spring Break atLake of the Ozarks. Show me state, indeed. It’s been quite some time since Operative JAB wrote in from … Continue reading →

Posted in E.J. Dionne, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, New York Times - NYT, Paul Krugman, Washington Post - WaPo

Second on Third

The Gormogons Posted on October 15, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Mitch used to write in from time to time, and thank goodness he’s still out there. Yesterday, the Czar had to sum up the evolution from the Whigs to the 1860 Republican Party in a half-sentence. Not surprisingly, Mitch thought … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Republicans, Tea Party, Voting

All Our Readers Sure Is Smarts

The Gormogons Posted on October 12, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

We have ourselves a ghost-like minion, who treads invisibly amidst popular culture. Indeed, his very code name is Ghost, although it turns out that’s a ridiculous coincidence. Dread Lord, I humbly present this to your glorious radiance. As requested, I … Continue reading →

Posted in Accountants, Drunks, Gormogon Operatives, I'm not as think as you drunk I am, Mailbag, Minions

One Other Thing

The Gormogons Posted on October 11, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Borepatch—yes him—sent us a motorcycle with a letter rolled into a tube and hidden inside the tail pipe: I’d add in the collapse of the public education establishment to your excellent list. At the local level you see push back … Continue reading →

Posted in Borepatch, Liberals, Mailbag, Public Education, Teacher Unions

Mailbag: Shutdown

The Gormogons Posted on October 8, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

About websites being shutdown for theatrical reasons: Your Czarness: Also shut down are the SEC webpage that allows one to file and to track corporate filings and the USGS webpage that allow one to look up seismic data for a … Continue reading →

Posted in Government Shutdown, Island Dweller, Mailbag

Mailbag

The Gormogons Posted on October 5, 2013 by GorTApril 6, 2014

JAB write to the shiny metallic one regarding this post: Dear Mr. GorT:   Your advice to the GOP strikes me as spot-on, but I fear they are too stupid to follow it.  Had they any gumption, they would long … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, Roman Catholics, The Obama Amateur Hour

Blues Cruz

The Gormogons Posted on October 3, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

From the Doublewide, JAB writes in after too long an absence (but do we not always say that about her?): Dear Your Czarness: Yes, indeedy, some jack-wagon “supervisor” in some office in DC decided the putting up barricades and tape … Continue reading →

Posted in Doublewide, Government Shutdown, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Operative BG, Ted Cruz

Taking It To The Streets

The Gormogons Posted on September 27, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar found a mysterious photograph slipped under his door; the picture was simply of white clouds against a blue sky. Assuming the worst, we ran the picture through GorT and Mandarin’s stegiographic decompiler, and sure enough—a message was encoded … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Minion, Unemployment

Obamacare and Other Disasters

The Gormogons Posted on September 25, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Many minions write to the Czar in an overtly supplicating tone, apparently terrified that the Czar will unleash some horrific punishment onto them. Ridiculous! The Czar encourages and welcomes all manners of correspondence with his minions, for he truly respects … Continue reading →

Posted in Government Run Healthcare, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Minions, ObamaCare

Mail Three-fer

The Gormogons Posted on September 24, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

From the mailbag: First up, NSW writes: There’s another unintended consequence to raising the minimum wage in California. Minimum wage employees are not those paying to keep California running. Their small business employers probably pay a not insignificant portion of … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag

Mailbag – Dust and Cobwebs Edition

The Gormogons Posted on September 18, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Gentle Readers, Dr. J. has woefully neglected his inbox in which a couple of missives have been collecting dust. The first comes as a follow up to a recent letter from newly minted Operative DC. Operative DC, who also likes … Continue reading →

Posted in Education, Mailbag, Medical Education, Minions, Residents

Mailbag: Analects and Dialects

The Gormogons Posted on September 17, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Mailbag, when the Czar can take it a smidge easier and see what others have to say. First up, we have The Big Guy himself, Uncle Jay, who has an interesting observation about why alpacas spit when threatened: O most … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag

Mailbag – Opportunity Cost Edition

The Gormogons Posted on September 12, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Operative Javahead writes: Some supporting evidence for your position – My older daughter is in her final year of pharmacy school (going for her Pharm. D. at Loma Linda). As an undergrad she’d originally planned to apply for medical school, … Continue reading →

Posted in Economics, Internships, Mailbag, Medicine, Pharmacy, Work Wives

Mailbag – Archivist Edition

The Gormogons Posted on September 10, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Yeah, We can’t go with anything naughty associated with our Archivist… The lovely, and off the market, Marie Bernadette (@MariebernadetteE), the Castle Archivist writes: Dear Dr. J.:  Good insight into the TN school system way of things in today’s post. … Continue reading →

Posted in Archivist, Hypocrisy, Mailbag, Public Schools

Expedition to the Plateau of Leng

The Gormogons Posted on September 3, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Gentle Readers, Dr. J.’s recent post in which he took the ‘Which D&D Character Are You’ was quite popular with the readers. Indeed, two of our operatives and two of Dr. J.’s old gaming mates took the quiz. As a … Continue reading →

Posted in Dungeons and Dragons, Gormogonica, Iron Man, Mailbag, Nerds

Mailbag – Cabbages and Kings Edition

The Gormogons Posted on September 1, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

It wasn’t long before Dr. J. received a missive from none other than Operative RBK who returned from the other side of the mirror where he was on R&R from all things operative. He writes in regarding Dr. J.’s recent anti-Krugman … Continue reading →

Posted in Economic policy, Energy, Gormogon Operatives, Jim Cooper, Mailbag, ObamaCare, Paul Krugman, The Obama Amateur Hour

Mailbag – Back to Skool Edition

The Gormogons Posted on August 29, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

College football players are checking out the talent helping a freshman co-ed move in on move-in day. Gormogon longtime fan, reader and sometime writer, JAB writes from the doublewide: Dear Mr. Dr. J.:  I read your “Big Skool” post with … Continue reading →

Posted in Big Skool, Friend of Gormogons, Mailbag

War, Antebellum

The Gormogons Posted on August 15, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

We received an interesting appendix on World War II by SW, who writes in with some historical sobriety—just how much we fought prior to Pearl Harbor: The US suffered combat casualties long before Pearl Harbor. The earliest was the USS … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, U.S. Navy, World War II

Mailbag: Military and Science

The Gormogons Posted on August 14, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller writes in to reference our exploration of FDR’s military aims. As usual, ID has some very interesting information: Most dread and awful majesty: I have read with great interest of your find of the newspaper you uncovered during … Continue reading →

Posted in Galileo Galileo Galileo Figaro, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Minions, ScottO, World War II

Mailbag – Ketchup Edition

The Gormogons Posted on August 10, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Mrs. Volgi modeling the Volgimobile Dr. J. was delinquent with regard to this missive from the great ScottO, who you better be following on twitter @gscottoliver. He writes regarding Dr. J.’s recent rant on Obamacare: Most Excellent Doctor,  At the … Continue reading →

Posted in Friend of Gormogons, Gremlin, Luxury Cars, Mailbag, Minion, ObamaCare, Pacer, Professor Mondo, Spawn

Barrel Smoking

The Gormogons Posted on August 8, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Well, thanks, ‘Puter, for what the heck that was. Turns out this smoking conversation has inspired a lot of conversation, both in the Castle and even down at the Doublewide. JAB, after a too-long absence writes in: Your Czarness: As … Continue reading →

Posted in cooking, Doublewide, Mailbag

Unwanted Entitlements

The Gormogons Posted on August 5, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller carefully wrote this onto a stick of gum, chewed it to get it past security, and placed this on a Castle window for us to find and reconstruct. Unless we are wrong in how we deciphered the squiggles … Continue reading →

Posted in Government Control, Government Run Healthcare, Government spending, Island Dweller, Mailbag, ObamaCare, Prohibition

Mailbag Triple Play

The Gormogons Posted on August 4, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 5, 2020

Lots of email has arrived. Better start getting through it. First up today, Mark Spahn, Lord Ruler of West Seneca, New York, has been discussing our site with others—as you are surely doing, if you know what is good for … Continue reading →

Posted in Aliens, Daylight Saving Time, Foul Language, Japanese language, Language, Mailbag

Signing Your Language Away

The Gormogons Posted on August 3, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Mark Spahn, ersatz ruler of West Seneca, poses some questions to test the Czar’s acuity this early Saturday morning. The video is introduced by the irritating voice and now-jowly visage of sometime U.S. presidential candidate Pat Robertson, but stick with … Continue reading →

Posted in Esperanto, Foul Language, Language, Mailbag, Minion

Male Bag: Pope Francis and the Homosexuals Edition

The Gormogons Posted on August 1, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

‘Puter’s super! Thanks forasking! ‘Puter’s fond of this post’s title. It reminds him of an Aesop’s fable, like Androcles and the Lion, but more fabulous and with better clothes. More to the point, ‘Puter found this missive from Operative SMR … Continue reading →

Posted in Castle Gormogon, Gay Marriage, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag, Marriage, Pope Don't Float, Pope Francis, Roman Catholics

Predicting Detroit

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller with a retrospective on the Death of Detroit; well worth your time and attention so heed: Most illustrious sultan of the steppes: This post is just a couple of observations about Detroit’s demise. I am a native of … Continue reading →

Posted in Bankruptcy, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Municipal Bankruptcy, West Beirut (Detroit)

‘Puter’s Totally Not Homophobic And Life-Affirming Male Bag!

The Gormogons Posted on July 26, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

The 2013 All-Castle Pride Parade Male Chorus prepares to sing its a cappella version of U2’s  Pride: In the Name of Man on Man Love ‘Puter’s gotten more mail this week than he has in some time, so he’s trying … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Castle Gormogon, Gormogon Operatives, Mailbag

Sleestak and Zimmerman?

The Gormogons Posted on July 25, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

This is weird. The Czar received not one but two emails within minutes of each other regarding a claim on the Internet that Sleestak may have shot Trayvon Martin. First, Borepatch wrote in followed a few moments later by Chiefjaybob, … Continue reading →

Posted in Borepatch, Mailbag, Minion, Minions, Sleestak

Answering our Femail: Glinda the Good on Feminism

The Gormogons Posted on July 22, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar isn’t sure what Island Dweller was ranting about the other day, but obviously Glinda the Good was following it pretty carefully, as she provides her thoughts in response. My Gracious Leader; In reading the contribution of Island Dweller … Continue reading →

Posted in Feminism, Mailbag, Progressives

Male Bag! Now With Even More Males! And Bags!

The Gormogons Posted on July 18, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

That’s not the diplomatic pouch to which ‘Puter referred, Operative ML. Now putit down! Actually, this mailbag’s about the Zimmerman verdict and self-defense law. ‘Puter just enjoys revving up the humorless shrew wing of the gay lobby by linking ‘Puter’s … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Gormogon Operatives, Guns, Lawyers, Mailbag, Self Defense, Zimmerman

Understanding Zimmerman and Martin

The Gormogons Posted on July 17, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller writes a nice letter about the Zimmerman trial on the back of a prescription for Clomipramine. Your omniscience: Esteemed Associate and I were discussing the Martin case last evening. I encapsulate our conversation for you. One has to … Continue reading →

Posted in Bullshit racism accusations, Crime, Island Dweller, Legal Words, Mailbag

Mailbag – Huckleberry Edition

The Gormogons Posted on July 17, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

The Huckleberry’s Huckleberry LTC Dan writes: Dear Dr. J.,   I don’t remember this from the movie TOMBSTONE…  Love ya, mean it!  LTC Dan We love you too man! Thank you, again, for your service to our country. We thought about … Continue reading →

Posted in Dentistry, Doc Holliday, Mailbag, Minions, Val Kilmer the Thirteenth Imam

Mailbag – Yelp* I need somebody! Edition.

The Gormogons Posted on July 12, 2013 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

The great ScottO writes: O Most Powerful and Wise Dr. J.,  I read your review of the Yelp Dr. J.

Continue reading →
Posted in Gormogonica, Mailbag, Minions, ScottO, Social Media

Castles of One Sort or Another

The Gormogons Posted on July 10, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

All this and more can be yours for only $19.95! Your imperial majesty: My own царица has fled the aquatic hinterlands and is currently esconsced with the girls in the Big Easy. This leave me with more time on my … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Congress, Mailbag

Male Bag: ‘Puter’s Juvenile Puns, Gratuitous Gay Pride Pictures Are Relevant For Once!

The Gormogons Posted on July 2, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

These are either the ugliest lesbians ‘Puter’sever seen or Czar and Dat Ho are trollingfor sailors during Fleet Week again. Bettermake sure Czar hasn’t drunk his bail fund. ‘Puter received this missive from Island Dweller (by way of Czar who … Continue reading →

Posted in Gay Marriage, Gays, Island Dweller, Liberals, Mailbag, Minions, Supreme Court

Shooting and Lawyers. Two Words That Might Go Together

The Gormogons Posted on June 27, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Could the Czar be any happier than to have not one but two highly respected epistolarians offer sweet prose on different topics, each of which deserves a response. First, in order of arrival, is Borepatch, who delights us with a … Continue reading →

Posted in Borepatch, Congress, Firearms, Girls With Guns, Guns, Island Dweller, Lawyers, Mailbag, Military, Shooting, The law is an ass

The Pause That Refreshes

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2013 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Yeah, pretty much everything stops when LTC(R) Dan writes in. The Gormogons, as you well know, enjoy considerable military acquaintanceship, but we probably all give pause when LTC Dan writes in because, as you know, he is as smart as … Continue reading →

Posted in Congress, Mailbag, Military

Post navigation

← Older posts

Visitor’s Guide

About Us

A secret society dedicated to the restoration of the Kingdom of Poland-Lithuania, the imprisonment of Esperanto speakers, and furthering the eschatological doctrine of the Return from Occultation of the Thirteenth Imam, Val Kilmer. Seriously, what happened to that guy? He was awesome in Tombstone. ایمام سیزدهم

Scribble, scribble…

To contact your hosts and pledge your undying obedience, e-mail dr.j, gort, puter, theczar, themandarin or thenotoriousoev followed by the at sign, gormogons, then a ., and finally, com.

De Gormogonorum Mysteriis

Archives

  • July 2024
  • July 2023
  • February 2023
  • August 2022
  • June 2022
  • May 2022
  • March 2022
  • January 2022
  • December 2021
  • November 2021
  • October 2021
  • September 2021
  • August 2021
  • July 2021
  • June 2021
  • May 2021
  • April 2021
  • March 2021
  • January 2021
  • December 2020
  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • August 2011
  • July 2011
  • June 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • February 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • September 2010
  • August 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010
  • March 2010
  • February 2010
  • January 2010
  • December 2009
  • November 2009
  • October 2009
  • September 2009
  • August 2009
  • July 2009
  • June 2009
  • May 2009
  • April 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • January 2000
  • September 1999
  • July 1998
  • May 1998
  • September 1997
  • August 1997
  • July 1997
  • February 1997
  • September 1996
  • August 1996
  • September 1995
  • May 1995
  • July 1994
  • April 1994
  • March 1994
  • February 1994
  • October 1993
  • March 1992
  • May 1990
  • September 1988
  • December 1986
  • September 1981
  • September 1979
  • May 1977
  • July 1976
  • May 1972
  • December 1970
  • August 1970
©2025 - The Gormogons - Weaver Xtreme Theme
↑
Manage Cookie Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}