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The Gormogons

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Monthly Archives: May 2015

How to Avoid Chinese MERS and Not Die A Lot

The Gormogons Posted on May 29, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 29, 2015

Your Czar is concerned with your health, and naturally has asked his Czarist Imperial Surgeon’s Office to prepare a bullet point list on how you can best protect yourself against the MERS, which is known as H1N1A, or more commonly, … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Scouting Redux

The Gormogons Posted on May 26, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 26, 2015

Seems that whenever there’s a Democrat in the White House, the Boy Scouts become a target for criticism. A number of voices are joining the unfounded and totally unresearched criticism of the BSA policy against water pistols, to which Retired … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Being Prepared. Being Very Prepared.

The Gormogons Posted on May 25, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 25, 2015

As the Left continues to dominate popular culture, the Right obsesses in its quest to develop a Purity Test that will, at long last, eliminate everyone from the conservative cause. The latest surprise potshot was taken at that long-time stalwart … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

New York Times’ Editors Are Morons: A Continuing Series Of ‘Puter-iffic Posts

The Gormogons Posted on May 21, 2015 by 'PuterMay 21, 2015

‘Puter’s hopping mad this morning, and that’s not a pretty sight. After all, ‘Puter’s a 5’10” Shrek-like man-beast partial to wearing orange leisure suits. What’s got ‘Puter’s gold lamé man thong in a bunch, you ask? The New York Times … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged 'Puter's Always Right, Fossil Fuels, New York Times, Suck It Czar

Mailsatchel…sack…bag….Whatever

The Gormogons Posted on May 20, 2015 by GorTMay 20, 2015

Two emails in the delivery chute today: Mark Spahn took a break from emailing the Czar to step up his game and email yours truly, the shiny robot.  (“Suck it, Czar” shouts ‘Puter from the Rumpus Room couch): Dear GorT, … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, Mark Spahn

Damn Dirty Fuels!

The Gormogons Posted on May 18, 2015 by GorTMay 20, 2015

What is the one thing missing in our national discussions around the conflation that is climate change, fossil fuels, green energy, and energy independence?  Nuclear power.  Plain and simple. A recent study finds that it is possible to completely replace … Continue reading →

Posted in Nuclear power (more now please)

The King Is Dead

The Gormogons Posted on May 17, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 17, 2015

The Czar believes a hagiography on the late B.B. King is warranted, especially after the lively discussions we shared on Twitter with so many of you. Mr. King’s death was a blow for all music, worldwide, and not just a … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

How to Scratch the Surface

The Gormogons Posted on May 14, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 14, 2015

Well, probably most of you recall that the Царица, the Czar’s wonderful wife, is a public school teacher. Some may recall that she works in an inner-city, borderline impoverished district. All of you can predict that she is virulently anti-union … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

It’s For the Children!

The Gormogons Posted on May 14, 2015 by GorTMay 14, 2015

Far too often we hear that cry from the left – the evil-doers on the right are trying to defund education and school lunch programs and force kids into factories while those on the left are fighting for the children … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Amtrak is a Luxury. It Could be Profitable.

The Gormogons Posted on May 14, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 14, 2015

Amtrak ticket sales cover 88% of its operating costs, which means the Federal government picks up the balance. After that year, Congress awarded Amtrak $1.4 billion in subsidies. This means that Amtrak’s total operating costs equate to $11.667 billion. Ridership … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Spurning Religion? Hardly.

The Gormogons Posted on May 12, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 12, 2015

The Czar has spoken in the past, quite authoritatively, that Americans remain a very religious lot: we are, by our nature, a church-slash-temple-slash-synagogue-slash-mosque-going people. Every so often, a bit of political theater calls this into question. Anytime a quasi-religious or … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Bulletins from 1957

The Gormogons Posted on May 8, 2015 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.May 8, 2015

Kevin D. Williamson has a typically terrific piece today on “‘Mass Destruction of Capital’ as a Liberal Economic Panacea,” which centers around “a poisonous and dangerous nostalgia in our political discourse, which out of the nearly two-and-one-half centuries of American … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Organic Truths

The Gormogons Posted on May 7, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 7, 2015

The Czar heard an ad on the radio today for organic cotton bedsheets. The ad’s spokeswoman was quick to say that “organic” was not a just buzzword, but in fact accurate: the sheets are organic cotton because that provides the … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Let’s Answer Some Mail

The Gormogons Posted on May 6, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 6, 2015

The Czar has had quite a bit of mail to get through lately; fortunately, most of it is total trash: “Eh, yer so funny!” “Hey, you’re not quite right on a historical bit of trivia!” “Eh, yer so overdue on … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Czar’s Advice on High School Commencement Speeches: Start Making Sense

The Gormogons Posted on May 5, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 5, 2015

Hey, high schoolers! Graduation is just a couple weeks away (or so), and you valedictorians are probably getting your speeches ready for the big day, right? Well, stop, because your speech is awful. Let the Czar help you out. If … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Avengers: Age of Ultron Preview. Or Review, Maybe.

The Gormogons Posted on May 4, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovyMay 4, 2015

The Czar is well aware that we owe you all a review of the Avengers: Age of Ultron movie, although by this point you either saw it, won’t see it, or might get around to it when it’s on cable. … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

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