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Reading Scores

The Gormogons Posted on August 25, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Well, who doesn’t love someone smart writing in: Dear Czar, As I read your post entitled “Liberal Science“, a light dawned upon me. When you pointed out that reading began to suffer along with math and science, I was struck … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, READ A BOOK, Teacher Unions, Teachers, Teaching

Mailbag – Interoffice Memo Edition

The Gormogons Posted on August 25, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Dr. J. found this an inter-office mail envelope with Polish sausage grease, blood (human, type AB+) and encephalic fluid stains on his desk this morning, meaning that it could only come from The Czar: Date: August 24th, 2011 A.D. (ed. … Continue reading →

Posted in Apple, Gormogonica, iPhone, The Gormogonickal Seal of Approval®

Liberal Science

The Gormogons Posted on August 25, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Readers here know the Czar has some pet peeves. One is the notion that Republicans hate science, and Democrats/Liberals are its most ardent supporters. And these same readers know that the Czar likes to list every example of Liberals or … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Liberals, Science

Don’t Let Me Down…

The Gormogons Posted on August 25, 2011 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

Florida Senator Marco Rubio (R) saves Nancy Reagan from serious injury after she stumbles. Your Mandarin wonders if this is not a metaphor for how true conservatives like Senator Rubio can rescue the Reagan legacy and the United States from … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Hollywood conservatives, Hope and Change, Ronald Reagan

Lord of the Flies

The Gormogons Posted on August 25, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

It appears increasingly likely that ‘Puter and Volgi’s homeland (and GorT’s current residence) is going to be taking a whuppin’ from Hurricane Irene this weekend. Based on DC’s performance during Earthquake-A-Palooza 2011, ‘Puter figured his peeps in the Greater DC … Continue reading →

Posted in Disaster, Hurricane, Stupid People

A Running Hunstman Merry

The Gormogons Posted on August 25, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

So veteran 80s cop show character-actor Jon Huntsman is at risk of running as an independent? So wonders the right-wing media, way more so than Huntsman himself—who seems far more interested in questioning how Gov. Rick Perry can run the … Continue reading →

Posted in Election

Stupidity on an Olympic Scale…

The Gormogons Posted on August 24, 2011 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

Your Mandarin has taken the time out of his busy day performing experiments on replacing the creamy filling in Twinkies with a synthetic polymer – although some would say there really is no difference – to award the coveted and … Continue reading →

Posted in Gun control, Gun Ownership, London, Olympics, Progressives

Quake and Cane

The Gormogons Posted on August 24, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

MC writes in after a weird and unexplained absence: First the earthquake, next should be Irene on Saturday. DC does not do well with tropical systems either. The Mandarin has wisely steered it, by way of apology for the earthquake, … Continue reading →

Posted in EARTHQUAAAKE, Hurricane

In which Dr. J. loses his iPhone

The Gormogons Posted on August 24, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Gentle readers, Dr. J. lost his iPhone last Thursday. Given that it was an AT&T iPhone 3G, it was old, slow and with spotty coverage, especially at work. New Atlantis Ivory Tower Medical Center has a deal with Sprint, anyway, … Continue reading →

Posted in Eleventy, iPhone, Technology

Earthquake Roundup

The Gormogons Posted on August 24, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

After we quelled the ninja zombies* and other madness that the “east coast earthquake” (as the media outlets are labeling it in fancy graphics), I had some time to reflect on what happened and what I observed. 1.  People in … Continue reading →

Posted in EARTHQUAAAKE

5.9 Earthquake Near Richmond, VA

The Gormogons Posted on August 23, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Yes, the Gormogons felt the 5.9 Earthquake that was centered outside Richmond, VA.  No, it’s not distracting us from our regular Gormogon business. GorTGorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Thoughts on Imagination

The Gormogons Posted on August 23, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

On the way into work today one of the local news stations had a brief spot that highlighted the generational differences between those entering college this year and their professors. It was intended to show that some culutral references will … Continue reading →

Posted in Atari, Lego, Nostalgia, Video games

Morality Question For The Day

The Gormogons Posted on August 23, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Is it morally wrong to pray for Hurricane Irene to have wreaked utter devastation on Puerto Rico’s housing stock so your company can collect on insurance policies and not be hassled with actually selling the collateral? ‘Puter also hypothetically prayed … Continue reading →

Posted in Hurricane, Moral hazard, Puerto Rico

Mentsch Tracht, Gott Lacht

The Gormogons Posted on August 23, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Here’s an interesting little column from The Washington Post’s Michael Gerson. Mr. Gerson writes to show how willing liberal elites, particularly those in media, are to paint anyone religious as a crackpot bent on imposing Christian theocracy on America. What … Continue reading →

Posted in Liberals, Religion

Just as long as his name is not Hector…

The Gormogons Posted on August 23, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

It’s alive, ALIVE! NASA has awakened Robonaut 2, the next generation in space robots on the International Space Station. Yahoo discusses the robot here. NASA is excited about the use of the robot in space in that it can take … Continue reading →

Posted in NASA, Robots

Baseball Can Be Great TV Fare

The Gormogons Posted on August 22, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The family spent a good deal of the weekend watching the Little League World Series, which is really one of the best ways to watch baseball—kids from around the world playing their hearts out, as if every routine pop fly … Continue reading →

Posted in Talkin' Baseball, That's Not Funny, This sport really sucks

Religious Fringe Benefits

The Gormogons Posted on August 22, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Some of you wrote in supporting the Czar’s tirade against the volunteer head of religious education at his local Muscovy church. As you recall, the Цесаревич, and now sigh the Царевич as well, must attend religious education over at Наша … Continue reading →

Posted in Pope Don't Float, Professional Catholics®, Roman Catholics, Science, Skepticism, Unam sanctam catholicam apostolicam ecclesiam

Leading From Behind in the Polls

The Gormogons Posted on August 21, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

What a welcome surprise always is a vulture sitting on the parapet outside our window, a hand-written note tightly tied around the talon from our Ninjababe Minion Emily G. Also sprach Ninjababe: I was tempted to great your Czarness with … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Emily, Mailbag, Paul Ryan, President

Muscovy Table Talk

The Gormogons Posted on August 21, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar took the family out to a really outstanding but noisy Mexican restaurant the other night. In the booth behind us, the Czar’s finely tuned ears picked out a woman saying “…the Democrats. They want to ‘tax the rich, … Continue reading →

Posted in Democrats, Republicans, The Czar of Muscovy

Corporations are People and so is Soylent Green

The Gormogons Posted on August 20, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

The Czar stated the following in an earlier post: Last week, Mitt Romney famously declared “Corporations are people, too, my friend.” The media high-fived each other and ran with it. Ha! What a bonehead that Mitt Rom—wait, what is that? … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica, Mitt Romney, Taxes

Iconoclasty

The Gormogons Posted on August 20, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Well, now, this is just really great prose: My subject, however, is the recurring Democratic complaint—or, more properly, talking point—that the Republican Party has now ‘strayed’ so far to the right that its onetime standard bearers, from Abraham Lincoln to … Continue reading →

Posted in Democrats, President, Republicans

Neat cover of a song so iconic it’d give one pause to record

The Gormogons Posted on August 20, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

Via the Anchoress Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Club Gormogon

Canadiana

The Gormogons Posted on August 20, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

MH, whose loyalty will surely see him as sole ruler of the Canadianan provinces, brings you news that you just do not get here in the US. And indeed, this is a story the Czar knew nothing about. See why … Continue reading →

Posted in Canada, Defense spending, Military, Spotlight On...

Quit Unforcing Those Errors!

The Gormogons Posted on August 20, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Ah, the end of summer: baseball is winding down, kids are going back to school, and the media starts to ridicule conservatives for things they say. We all know how the game works: when Democrats say stupid things, it’s because … Continue reading →

Posted in Climate Change, Conservatism, Creationism, Evolution, Gasoline Prices, Main Stream Media, Media, Media Bias, Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Republicans, Rick Perry, Ron Paul

Vacation, all I ever wanted…Vacation, had to get away

The Gormogons Posted on August 19, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

President Obama is on vacation on Martha’s Vineyard (and yes, the proper preposition is ON for you little people). His vacation, like all presidential vacations has generated controversy. Dr. J. isn’t going to spend his time engaging in sniping about … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, the Go Go's, Vacations

On This Spot In 1996 The Czar Drank Beer

The Gormogons Posted on August 18, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

ME writes in. Your Dreaded Czarness, As a current resident of Germantown (though hopefully a temporary one until I return to badlands of Arizona), I beg your permission to embark on a quest to look for the spot at where … Continue reading →

Posted in Leftism, Mailbag, Main Stream Media, Maryland, Media, Media Bias, Social Media

Nerd Humor

The Gormogons Posted on August 18, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

I saw this on a friend’s Facebook site and it made me laugh.  For the most part I find this farirly accurate in a nerdy kind of way.  Click image to embiggen. GorTGorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Nerds

Mercury is in retrograde…

The Gormogons Posted on August 18, 2011 by Dr. J.June 5, 2020

Mercury is in retrograde, and has been so since August 2nd, and will last until August 26th. This website describes the phenomenon nicely. In general, Mercury rules thinking and perception, processing and disseminating information and all means of communication, commerce, … Continue reading →

Posted in Astrology, Astronomy, Cars

The real problem in Britain…and elsewhere

The Gormogons Posted on August 18, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

Bad as the riots in Britain are, what’s most worrisome is the apparent lack of any ideas in the British establishment that could actually make such riots less likely in the future. The Tories seem vacuous, and Labour says, as … Continue reading →

Posted in Apocalypse now, Christianity, Decline of the West, Great Britain, Urban Decay

HIV the gift that keeps on giving.

The Gormogons Posted on August 18, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

While Dr. J. was on vacation, the dinner conversation turned to a new breakthrough in the cancer field. Dr. J.’s astute mother in law picked up the story on the news, and blindsided Dr. J. and Mrs. Dr. J. (who … Continue reading →

Posted in Health care, leukemia, Mad science

Sounds Like the Right Approach

The Gormogons Posted on August 17, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

It’s promising to hear a company take the approach that SpaceX is with regards to the future of manned spaceflight.  Specifically, they’re addressing costs in a very upfront and transparent way without divulging too much for competitors.  Hopefully, they can … Continue reading →

Posted in Innovation, Space

Mailbag – Will the real Dr. J. please stand up?

The Gormogons Posted on August 17, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Dr. J. is back from his biennial hajj-al-inlaaws in New England and New York. Dr. J., Mrs. Dr. J., the lil resident and lil med student took in some of the sights in NYC, but Dr. J. mostly relaxed poolside … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. J., Government Run Healthcare, Government spending, Mailbag

Be Prepared…

The Gormogons Posted on August 17, 2011 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

The Chicago Tribune has an article about the daring rescue by 17-year-old Benjamin Groeper of a man who had fallen off the subway platform as a train was coming into the station. According to the article as other people just … Continue reading →

Posted in Boy Scouts of America, Dirty Liberals, Liberals, Progressives

Nihil Novi Sub Sole

The Gormogons Posted on August 17, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Once again, it falls to the Gormogons to spell it out for everybody. Another “flash mob” incident happened in Germantown, MD, in which a group of 28 teens charged a convenience store and looted the place, evacuating in under a … Continue reading →

Posted in Hard Hat Riots, Haymarket Riot, Hippies…they say they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad, Journalism, Leftism, Liberal Fascism, Main Stream Media, Media, Social Media

The press and the left

The Gormogons Posted on August 17, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

As the Czar points out infra, Professor W.R. Mead makes a very good point about how the media’s uncritical adulation of whatever their heroes on the left side of the aisle do keeps those pols from actually encountering the facts … Continue reading →

Posted in Democrats, Main Stream Media, Media, Media Bias, Pop Psychology, Psychology

Three Lefts Make A… Anyone?

The Gormogons Posted on August 16, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Not too far off from an essay in which is Czar showed how liberals continually move the goalposts out of a mistaken belief in their own popularity, Walter Russell Mead at The American Interest recounts the same history of the … Continue reading →

Posted in Journalism, Leftism, Liberals, Main Stream Media, Media, Media Bias, New York Times - NYT, Wisconsin

As Bad As All That?

The Gormogons Posted on August 16, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

For the record, the Czar is not at all interested in Governor Rick Perry’s tough talk on Ben Bernanke. Not given the years of worse crap we have heard from liberal politicians. We know liberal amnesia is bad, but you … Continue reading →

Posted in Election, Hypocrisy, Liberal Fascism, Liberals

Meeting the Big Guy Himself

The Gormogons Posted on August 15, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

And so the Czar was lucky to have no less a personage than Uncle Jay over to the Castle for a brief lunch. You do read Uncle Jay every day, no? Anyway, with a rare-enough trip to Chicago in his … Continue reading →

Posted in Castle Gormogon, Club Gormogon, Friend of Gormogons

Pure Genius

The Gormogons Posted on August 15, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

These guys are about as good as Wile E. Coyote catching the Road Runner: utter failure while believing the whole time that they are super-geniuses.  The early word from the People’s Republic of California is that the so-called “Amazon tax” … Continue reading →

Posted in California, Economics, Liberals

Off The Deep End

The Gormogons Posted on August 15, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Paul Krugman is off his rocker…or meds…or smoking something.  He was on a Sunday talk show where he actually said essentially that we need space aliens threatening to attack in order to save our economy.  First, the conversation began with the … Continue reading →

Posted in Economics, Liberals, Paul Krugman

Sick Stigma

The Gormogons Posted on August 15, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

BG writes in with an observation (and curious ploy) appropriate to a topic much on our mind lately: Great and Wondrous and (Regrettably, Apparently Lonesome) Czar – There is another meme out there, which was on display on the cover … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Election, Main Stream Media, Media, Media Bias, Michele Bachmann, Sarah Palin

10 Trends Worth Hating in Movies

The Gormogons Posted on August 14, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Den of Geek, whose website is a bit too frenetic for the Czar, nevertheless has a superb essay: The 10 Biggest Problems With Modern Day Cinema. We wish that all Hollywood directors and producers would read it. They won’t, but … Continue reading →

Posted in Hollywood, Movies, This movie really sucks

You Can’t Spell Lemon Without LMN.

The Gormogons Posted on August 14, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Lifetime Movie Networks has anounced they are going to reboot several franchises. The Czar is not particularly a fan of the network, but knows in his encompassing wisdom that some of you are. Here is a taste of what you … Continue reading →

Posted in Movies, This movie really sucks

Browsing Our Web

The Gormogons Posted on August 14, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

One question we never get asked is what web browsers we use. GorT thought it would be a great idea if we each shared some information about our respective web browsers. So here goes. You geek dorks will find this … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica, Teh Intarweb, This browser really sucks

Chiba de Colombia

The Gormogons Posted on August 13, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

So, a number of sources describe “chiba” as being specifically or originally a particularly strong kind of cannabis from Colombia, so Colombian slang looked like a reasonable place to look. Here are two words, off by a vowel, both of … Continue reading →

Posted in Drugs, Etymology

More Chiba

The Gormogons Posted on August 13, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

Further investigation reveals that there was a slang term for heroin in the 1960s (or earlier) which was “chiva.” Related to “chiba?” Maybe. Confucius is on the case… Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Drugs, Etymology

Etymological Ruminations

The Gormogons Posted on August 13, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The most welcome and very non-riff-raffy Professor Mondo sends us a message inscribed on a reeve: O Terror of the Steppes (and also the Escalatorres): Your post reminded me of a bit of oddness I’ve wondered about for some time. … Continue reading →

Posted in Etymology, Mailbag, Mondo

Catalog of Books

The Gormogons Posted on August 13, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

You know, the Czar got a bit creeped out this past summer when he was in a large, commercial chain bookstore and saw an aisle—an aisle—named Supernatural Erotic Teen Fiction. That did not prepare him for the following sign he … Continue reading →

Posted in Cat Tossing, Catfish, Cato Institute, Dogs Are Better Than Cats, Free Cat, Smelly Cat

Quick Response

The Gormogons Posted on August 13, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

The picture on the left is called a QR Code – short for a Quick Response code.  You’ve probably started to see more and more of these around town.  Largely as part of some advertising campaign – maybe in the … Continue reading →

Posted in Cellphones, Technology

Hello? This Thing On?

The Gormogons Posted on August 13, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Let us see. Volgi is hiding up in his quarters with that goofy Yeti of his, watching another Sonny Chiba movie on Beta. Yeah, he sits there with his iPad now, Twittering all day. Averages about 800 tweets a day, … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Castle Gormogon, Dat Ho, Dr. J., GGorT, gonica, GorT, Grand Moghul, Prince Tochmas, Sleestak, The Czar of Muscovy, The Mandarin, Volgi, Volgi (pronounced Volgi)

One-Term President

The Gormogons Posted on August 12, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Internet fans like to use the word meme a lot without necessarily or remotely understanding what it means. Effectively, people use it like the word myth, although a meme is quite different from a myth. A meme is more than … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Election

Taking Debate

The Gormogons Posted on August 12, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar shall now speak on the Republican debate this evening. This was much livelier, and more engaging to watch. Some candidates really dislike the others, that’s for sure. But the questions were unbalanced or staged (why no economic questions … Continue reading →

Posted in Cannibalism, Election, Predictions, Republicans

Gormogons’ Next Vacation

The Gormogons Posted on August 11, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

GorT fired up the geospatial tools and plotted this vacation.  Why did we start in Tulsa, OK – because the Czar just had to see the Murder Mystery Dinner Theater at the local Dave & Buster’s.  What-evs.  Note: step #27 … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica

‘Puter’s Packing Up

The Gormogons Posted on August 11, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Nope, not to trek the Scottish Highlands, a la Brigadoon, but for his annual pilgrimage to the greater Delmarva Peninsula. Blogging may be lighter than usual, or it may be heavier than usual, or it may be usual than usual. … Continue reading →

Posted in Vacations

The Economical Trajectory

The Gormogons Posted on August 11, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

I’ve argued long and hard that the debate over the debt ceiling specifically is meaningless.  The real issue that faces us as a country is our spending.  Government spending is at the root of this issue.  For generations, the nation … Continue reading →

Posted in Economic policy

Fairness of Results v. Equality of Results

The Gormogons Posted on August 11, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

‘Puter has been up to his elbows in alligators at work of late, so posting has been light from him. What? Of course your Gormogons have side jobs. How else are we supposed to pay our bar tabs and keep … Continue reading →

Posted in Americans, England, Poverty, Stupid People, Stupid Politicians

Life Without Pain or Effort

The Gormogons Posted on August 11, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

If you’re not familiar with Emily Grace, who basically runs our PR department these days, you should be. On her own site, she compares Americans to the rioters in the UK and makes some astonishing points. She states she is … Continue reading →

Posted in Americans, Big Government, Emily, Euro-Elitist Academics, Hooray, London, Welfare

Time To Grow Up. Or Shut Up. You Choose.

The Gormogons Posted on August 11, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Well, now, what do we make of the Wisconsin recall elections? We could mention that the GOP’s success wasn’t overwhelming. We could mention that the two predictable wins gained by the Democrats may very well be offset by next week’s … Continue reading →

Posted in Boo fucking hoo, Election, Election Results, Liberals, Wisconsin, You Make the Baby Jesus Cry

’Puter will be airbrushing this on our airport shuttle van forthwith

The Gormogons Posted on August 10, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

From minion and twitteress, MbernadetteE (go follow her, you’ll like her, she’s way nicer than we), here’s today’s Gormogon tribute art. Confucius really needs to get around to opening that t-shirt shop so we can monetize the awesomeness. In the … Continue reading →

Posted in Art, Gormogonica, Oh Marie

Sorry!

The Gormogons Posted on August 10, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

We have all been so preoccupied today with the season premier of Top Shot that no one posted a thing. Anyway, gotta go… the conclusion is minutes away. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ … Continue reading →

Posted in Guns, Television, This TV show really sucks

Letters to a Cranky Czar

The Gormogons Posted on August 9, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Your Czarness, As much as I fear incurring wrath from the Castle, I must confess that I describe myself, politically speaking, as, ahem, an ….independent. I do vote and so contradict your first point, and as you’ve now had the … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Google, Liberals, Mailbag, Voting

Not Sure On This One

The Gormogons Posted on August 9, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Dear Mr. Czar, I couldn’t help but notice Mandarin’s animal testing. Here is a similar video: I came across this because of story where a guy worked for one of those online help sites- you enter chat with a person, … Continue reading →

Posted in Dogs Are Better Than Cats, Drugs, Skepticism, Smelly Cat

Mandy And Cats

The Gormogons Posted on August 7, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Czar, the depths of depravity and cruelty to which the Mandarin descends when experimenting on dogs is abominable. Please tell me he does something to cats, too. Indeed. He once put a kitten in a boot amplification module, with horrifying … Continue reading →

Posted in Animal Attacks, Dogs Are Better Than Cats, Free Cat, Mad science, The Mandarin

More of Mandy’s Minions

The Gormogons Posted on August 6, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Czar, we were horrified to learn of Mandarin’s gratuitous experimentation on animals. Is there any more? Please say yes. Here is an experiment in which a dog was introduced to a ball in a trash can. The Czar of MuscovyБожію … Continue reading →

Posted in Dog, Dogs Are Better Than Cats, Mad science, The Mandarin

It’s Gonna Be Quiet in the Castle Tonight

The Gormogons Posted on August 6, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

The Czar, Mandarin, ‘Puter and GorT and huddled around the 43.2’ dual-fusion plasma screen to watch Phineas & Ferb: Across the 2nd Dimension.  Hopefully, the Volgi will get back from the Hinterlands in time to join in.  If we’re not … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Mandarin’s Horrible Animal Experiments

The Gormogons Posted on August 5, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Czar, is it true that the Mandarin engages in bizarre experiments on animals? Yes, sad to say it is true. Here’s a typical one. Shocking. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. … Continue reading →

Posted in Animal Attacks, Dog, Dogs Are Better Than Cats, Mad science, The Mandarin

Birth Control, the follow up…

The Gormogons Posted on August 5, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Dr. J. is up late watching Fox News. The issue regarding HHS mandating insurance companies providing free birth control to all women who want it still sticks in his craw. In all of the debates he’s watched or listened to … Continue reading →

Posted in beating a dead horse, Government Run Healthcare

Horrifying Thought For The Day

The Gormogons Posted on August 4, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

The current recession is nothing compared to the one preordained by our continued debt-funded budgets. Think about it. What’s the primary cause of our continued Carteresque malaise? Consumer and business deleveraging, resulting from the bursting of an economic bubble. That … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, U.S. Economy

The Czar Reads Some Mail

The Gormogons Posted on August 4, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Our essay entitled “Bad Numbers for Progressives” generated two email responses. First, GD writes in with an embarrassing confession (for him, of course): Dread, awesome, etc. etc., I would propose that at least 10% in the “independent or moderate” category … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Gun control, Liberals, Libertarianism, Mailbag

Mailbag – An apple a day…yada yada

The Gormogons Posted on August 3, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

The esteemed Royal Mathematician, Dr. (KN)J writes in: Dear Dr. J., A recent missive of yours touched on a subject on which I have long been meaning to touch. Namely, the applicability, or lack thereof, of the “ounce of prevention, … Continue reading →

Posted in Math class is hard, Medicine, The Obama Amateur Hour

Ars Gratia Artis Sinistris

The Gormogons Posted on August 3, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Big Hollywood has a piece up by John Nolte in which he provides examples of federal dollars being spent to support starving artists whose works, basically, suck. Of course. This should be no surprise, and this premise explains two recurring … Continue reading →

Posted in Art, Government spending, Government Worship, This artwork really sucks

Solid Gold

The Gormogons Posted on August 3, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Paul Ryan penned this editorial in the Wall Street Journal today. Please go ahead and read it. No seriously, go read it. Now go and email it to 10 of your friends, tweet it and put it on your Facebook … Continue reading →

Posted in National Debt, Paul Ryan, The Obama Amateur Hour, U.S. Economy

Suicide Note…

The Gormogons Posted on August 2, 2011 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

Operative S.M. has presented your Mandarin with the following inquiry: Given the typical progressive dogmas: man kills earth, a man’s life has no value, and all men who are successful should have everything done to them to strip them of … Continue reading →

Posted in Abortion, Dirty Liberals, Eugenics, Hollywood liberals, Planned Parenthood, Progressives, Suicides

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

The Gormogons Posted on August 2, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

‘Puter’s been up to his ears in work, which, in this economy, is a wonderful fix in which to find one’s self. Today, amidst the current office insanity, ‘Puter received from outside counsel a pro se defendant’s pleadings. Pro se … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Lawyers, Stupid People

“Ya Down With OCP?” “Yeah, you know me!”

The Gormogons Posted on August 2, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

“Nothing is as expensive as it is when it is free,” or so goes the adage. Obamacare rears its ugly head again, obscured in the news by the debt ceiling debate and the like. Part of Obamacare is that the … Continue reading →

Posted in Drugs, Government Run Healthcare

VP Of The Country, Not Just Democrats

The Gormogons Posted on August 2, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Want to see a blog post/op ed that is 100% politically charged while being completely balanced between right and left? Alexandra Petri can do one. She wrote a masterful and point-blank humorous takedown of Vice-President Biden and his perpetually difficult … Continue reading →

Posted in Joe Biden, Washington Post - WaPo

Bad Numbers for Progressives

The Gormogons Posted on August 2, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

So Gallup concludes, correctly, that America leans conservative. Indeed, their recent poll (which confirms what we have known since the 1980s) holds about the same: 41 percent of Americans openly consider themselves conservative, and 21 percent consider themselves liberal. The … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Liberals, Progressives

You Are Invited….

The Gormogons Posted on August 2, 2011 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

Your Mandarin received the following electronic correspondence from operative S.M.: I started following your blog after a link 5-6 months ago from Keith Burgess Jackson or Bill Vallicela, either way, love your guys stuff. Just wanted to let you know … Continue reading →

Posted in Cigars, Coming Out Party, Hippies…they say they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad

Happy Birthday MTV!

The Gormogons Posted on August 1, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

30 Years Ago today, Dr. J. woke up early, and has he was want to do on lazy summer days. He was sitting in Dad’s chair, flipping though the 36 cable channels available in those halcyon early days of cable … Continue reading →

Posted in I want my MTV

Mailbag – Malebag 2.0

The Gormogons Posted on August 1, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Operative J.S. writes in on a Market Street style Polish from Portillo’s : Dear Mr. Dr. J, Thanks for your great medical commentary! I like that you keep us all up to date on those sorts of things. I had … Continue reading →

Posted in Circumcision, Health care, Mailbag

Gormogonicon 2011

The Gormogons Posted on August 1, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Today was a special day. While ‘Puter and Dr. J are running the Castle, the Czar was happy to host GorT, the Mandarin, and the 孔夫子, the Œcumenical Volgi (The Notorious ŒV) here at the Czar’s dacha in Muscovy. Actually, … Continue reading →

Posted in Castle Gormogon, Club Gormogon, Gormogonica, Gormogons

Just take a little off the top, please…

The Gormogons Posted on August 1, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

You may recall Dr. J. writing in a few months back, here, here, and here. By way of review, Lloyd Schofield petitioned to get a vote to ban male circumcision on the 2011 election day ballot in San Francisco. At … Continue reading →

Posted in Circumcision, Health care, Religion

Missionary Mail…

The Gormogons Posted on August 1, 2011 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

Your Mandarin received this message from operative HRE who is currently stationed in the hinterlands… Dear Mr. Mandyrin, I read your post on the mission at your parish, and I have to agree with your analysis 100%. Unfortunately for the … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Mission Impossible…

The Gormogons Posted on July 31, 2011 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

Each summer all parishes in the Chicago Archdiocese are asked to welcome a person representing a particular religious order that engages in missionary work. Today the guest speaker at the parish your Mandarin attends was Fr. Bob, O.S.A. from the … Continue reading →

Posted in Africa, Amazing Catholic Bullshit Generator, Professional Catholics®, Roman Catholics, Social Justice

More Big Guy Humor

The Gormogons Posted on July 31, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Uncle Jay, again with the great math jokes: Also, this: Cracks up my kids. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, … Continue reading →

Posted in Dog, Dogs Are Better Than Cats, Math class is hard

Mailbag: Old and Young

The Gormogons Posted on July 31, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Strangest email of the day: Oh great, dreaded and most powerful Czar of all Muscovies, The Japanese did an entire series of battleship vs. aliens. Starblazers as it is known in English chronicles the adventures of the crew of the … Continue reading →

Posted in All Your Base Are Belong To Us, Cartoons, Mailbag, UFOs

This Movie Really Sucks

The Gormogons Posted on July 30, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The offensively accurate Brendan at Tyler Durden shares something in common with the Czar: a total loathing for celebrities, coupled with Hollywood’s inexplicable idolatry for people who couldn’t figure out where the Panama Canal was located. Most of his stuff, … Continue reading →

Posted in Movies, This movie really sucks, U.S. Navy

Wait’ll You See The Chimney Sweeps

The Gormogons Posted on July 30, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Gormogons are thinking of rebooting the Mary Poppins franchise. Whattaya think of this as our first trailer? H/T to Jonah Goldberg. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was … Continue reading →

Posted in Movies, This movie really sucks

Iowahawk’s “Sixteen Tons”

The Gormogons Posted on July 30, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Deficit, Gallows Humor, Government spending, Iowahawk, National Debt

Mailbag – Smoke and Mirrors Edition

The Gormogons Posted on July 29, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Gentle Readers, Gormogon Operative BG writes in on a stack of $2 bills regarding the Debt Ceiling: Illustrious Gormogons – There’s something I don’t understand about this “one dollar of spending reductions for one dollar of debt ceiling hike” business. … Continue reading →

Posted in Apple, Mailbag, Military, National Debt

Pow, Zing, that’s got to hurt!

The Gormogons Posted on July 29, 2011 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

This article gave Dr. J. a chuckle, especially the ending. Apparently, the U.S. Treasury as of two days ago had a cash balance of $73.8 billion. By comparison, Apple Computer has a reserve of $76.2 billion. The author, Matt Rosoff … Continue reading →

Posted in Apple, Government spending, National Debt

Paging George Orwell

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

From Slashdot earlier this week: “Massachusetts wants to establish a database with the information gathered by license plate scanners installed in police cars. The scanners will scan license plates of every car the police vehicle passes and transmit that information (along … Continue reading →

Posted in Obama Administration, way too much technology

Left-right-center

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

Hey, Czar, the problem is that “right-wing” is a really bad descriptor. It’s basically a pejorative, as you note, at this point for “bad people.” But even if we take it a bit more analytically, comparing the European right to … Continue reading →

Posted in Fascism, Leftism, Liberal Fascism

ITZ 4 TEH CHIlDRUNZ!1!!eleventy!!1!

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

In the Boston Globe, we see yet another example of poor reporting, covering only one side of the story. You know, the side that supports the reporter’s favored policy outcomes. Ms. Kay Lazar writes about the growing number of underweight … Continue reading →

Posted in Boston Globe, Main Stream Media, Welfare

Spin the Numbers

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by GorTApril 6, 2014

There is a graph making its way around the intrawebs from a NY Times article penned by a Ms. Teresa Tritch on July 23, 2011 entitled, “How the Deficit Got This Big” (go Google it yourself, I’m not citing it … Continue reading →

Posted in Economics, Liberals, Media Bias

The Myth of Right-Wing Extremism

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar hates to play the blame game, and he would love to pin that reluctance on someone or something. But once again, we have to argue that the term “Right Wing” is not defined as “Anything the Left Wing … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Liberal Fascism, Liberals, Main Stream Media, Media, Media Bias, Norway

He Who Has Ears To Hear, Let Him Hear!

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

If you read only one piece on the hand-in-glove relationship between the debt ceiling crisis and out of control social program spending, let it be this editorial in today’s Wall Street Journal. Quoth the sages of Wall Street: According to … Continue reading →

Posted in Federal Budget, Government spending, National Debt, Wall Street Journal - WSJ

Malluma tago

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.April 6, 2014

Borepatch (see sidebar) sends over a note commemorating yesterday’s sad anniversary. This Day in Geek History: July 26 1887 The first book written in Esperanto, the international language invented by Ludwig Zamenhof, is published. Yes, it’s been 124 years since … Continue reading →

Posted in Esperanto

Le Dauphin

The Gormogons Posted on July 28, 2011 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

You know, the Czar was around for the French Revolution. And when he reads Arthur Herman draw some eerie parallels like this: Some people compare our current political turn, including the growth of the Tea Party, to the American Revolution. … Continue reading →

Posted in Big Government, Federal Budget, French Revolution, Government spending

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About Us

A secret society dedicated to the restoration of the Kingdom of Poland-Lithuania, the imprisonment of Esperanto speakers, and furthering the eschatological doctrine of the Return from Occultation of the Thirteenth Imam, Val Kilmer. Seriously, what happened to that guy? He was awesome in Tombstone. ایمام سیزدهم

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To contact your hosts and pledge your undying obedience, e-mail dr.j, gort, puter, theczar, themandarin or thenotoriousoev followed by the at sign, gormogons, then a ., and finally, com.

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