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‘Puter Busted!

The Gormogons Posted on June 26, 2009 by 'PuterJune 26, 2009

Finally the fuzz caught up to ‘Puter, busting both ‘Puter and Mrs. ‘Puter on a bogus domestic violence rap. That is, until ‘Puter realized he’d ben caught orange handed. *What kind of genius law enforcement officer writes in his report … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Cheetos

Friday reading

The Gormogons Posted on June 26, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 26, 2009

A video and some articles for clicking through if work is slow, or if you find yourself belangoured on the weekend. On Pajamas TV, FotG David Frum continues his argument for the GOP’s forming “new majority” by presenting itself differently … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, China, Conservatism, David Frum, India, Iran, Japan, Liberals, Republicans, Requiescat in pace, Socialized Medicine, South Korea

Michael Jackson…RIP!?!

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 25, 2009

The Crown Prince of Whacko…dead? The Czar did not see this one coming. Wow. Wish we had chosen a nicer picture under the circumstances. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The … Continue reading →

Posted in Michael Jackson, Requiescat in pace

Intercepted Twits

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 25, 2009

A great deal is being made about the role Twitter is playing in the Iranian turmoil. The Czar quickly decided to investigate how great this role is. The following dispatch arrived from our okhrana, which makes the Czar wonder if … Continue reading →

Posted in Iran, Satire, Twitter

TJIC on Sanford

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 25, 2009

We haven’t talked too much about Governor Sanford, which makes us once again totally unlke the media (who is talking about him way too much). The Emir of TJICistan seems to have completely captured the Czar’s thoughts on the matter, … Continue reading →

Posted in Mark Sanford, TJIC

Tron, Unplugged?

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 25, 2009

Your Volgi mocks the Czar, quite openly. One ingenious way he does it: he sends the Czar stories like this, in which a guy who has become an incredibly minor internet phenom for dressing something like a Tron character—except that … Continue reading →

Posted in This movie really sucks, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

Gore Bore?

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 25, 2009

Some House Democrats are struggling to get an ill-advised energy tax bill passed. Many Dems believe this will unrealistically hike energy taxes. Republicans think it’s bad business and bad for business. Evidently, they do not have the votes to get … Continue reading →

Posted in Al Gore, Democrats, Energy, Nancy Pelosi

Farrah Fawcett, RIP

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 25, 2009

By now, you have heard that actress Farrah Fawcett has passed away, largely as expected from such serious cancer. If this is the first you are hearing this, we support your decision to get your news only from this site. … Continue reading →

Posted in Farrah Fawcett, Requiescat in pace

Followers

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by GorTJune 25, 2009

Apparently Microsoft’s Internet Explorer 8 is having some issues with the Blogger sites, particularly those that use the “Followers” section. I’ve temporarily taken down that section in an attempt to allow those with IE8 to continue enjoying the site. From … Continue reading →

Posted in Microsoft, This browser really sucks

New Official Gormogons Euphemism

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by 'PuterJune 25, 2009

Committing adultery will henceforth be referred to as “hiking the Appalachian Trail.” So let it be written, so let it be done. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the … Continue reading →

Posted in Adultery, Mark Sanford

What, Me Worry?

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by 'PuterJune 25, 2009

With plunging tax revenues, California has stated it will issue IOUs to its creditors, including taxpayers. ‘Puter recommends a large Silicon Valley company purchase the IOUs from recipients for pennies on the dollar, then pay its California taxes with the … Continue reading →

Posted in (Goin' back to) Cali, California, Taxes

¡Good Question!

The Gormogons Posted on June 25, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 25, 2009

The Spanish professor is puzzled. Why, Gabriel Calzada wonders, is the U.S. president recommending that America emulate the Spanish model for creating “green jobs” in “alternative energy” even though Spain’s unemployment rate is 18.1 percent — more than double the … Continue reading →

Posted in Big Environment, Big Government, George Will, Spain, Unemployment

And for the trifecta

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 24, 2009

Ford gets into bed with the government. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Auto Bailout, Big Environment, Big Three

تيان آن من در تهران؟ Tiananmen in Tehran?

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 24, 2009

Pray for Iran. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Awfulness, Iran

That’ll Teach ‘Em

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 24, 2009

In another stunning show of amateurism, the White House is no longer offering invitations for Iranians to visit any July 4th celebrations around the world (see your Volgi, below, for a similar degree of shock). This is in response to … Continue reading →

Posted in Department of State, Iran, The Obama Amateur Hour

No baked beans for you!

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 24, 2009

The Iranian government’s Fourth-of-July invitations have been rescinded, conveys Mike Goldberg, again with some vociferous commentary. The hot dog diplomacy was a symbol of this administration’s naive faith in the power of diplomacy and in their own power of persuasion. … Continue reading →

Posted in Diplomacy, Iran, The Obama Amateur Hour

A Most Dangerous Thing

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 24, 2009

In an open love letter to POTUS Obama, Aaron Colohan of the Richmond Liberal Examiner opines that the President is doing a fine job of managing both Iran and North Korea, even though they are two very different countries. The … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Iran, Liberals, North Korea

Alan Greenspan, Sax Man

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 24, 2009

The best article you’ll read all month and the best thing Joe Queenan has written in years. One of the great what-ifs in recent history involves Alan Greenspan. Complicit in one of the greatest economic collapses ever, Greenspan has now … Continue reading →

Posted in Alan Greenspan, Jazz, Joe Queenan, Music

Paranoid, much?

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by GorTJune 24, 2009

In this WSJ article, Ms. Gorman discusses the plan by the current administration to kill an initiative started by President Bush to make use of government “spy” satellite data for domestic use. Let me first get my gripe out: the … Continue reading →

Posted in Satellite Technology, Spying

Can’t Spell “Oklahoma” Without The “Ho”

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by 'PuterJune 24, 2009

‘Puter’s waiting for Julia Roberts to reprise her role as a prostitute in this lovely little story. The setting? Oklahoma City. Characters? Lahoma Sue Smith*, hooker. Unnamed man, john. The plot? Man has marital difficulties, so naturally, he goes trolling … Continue reading →

Posted in Oklahoma, Prostitution

An Unheavenly Conjunction

The Gormogons Posted on June 24, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 24, 2009

The Czar thought it was creepy a while back when Natalie Cole did a duet with her late father. You know what could be an even weirder duet? Buzz Aldrin and Snoop Dog. If you have the sort of mind … Continue reading →

Posted in Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

Ed McMahon, RIP

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

A full-bird Marine colonel with 85 combat missions who taught carrier landings. Bet you didn’t know that. Let’s hope he’s gone to the Party Machine in the sky. Fast forward to 3:57 on the counter for the reference, possibly GorT’s … Continue reading →

Posted in Ed McMahon's Party Machine, Requiescat in pace

Payback against the soccer players…

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

…who dared to wear green wristbands. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Iran, Soccer

Obama & Iran: Better late than never?

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

Maybe, but Mike Goldfarb says, “Why the hell can’t he get it right the first time? Again?!” Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Barack Obama, Georgia (Sakartvelo), Iran, Russia

Obama & Iran: Better & Better

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

More credit where it’s due. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Barack Obama, Iran

Afghanistan: Not a winning strategy.

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

PR trumps war-fighting? Hearts and minds are very important, but killing the enemy is more important. Plus, you make this call, and immediately every Taliban stronghold will be surrounded by a ring of hostages. They’ll strap babies to their chests … Continue reading →

Posted in Afghanistan, Appearance of Weakness, Vietnam

All Barack Channel Health Care Extravaganza

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by 'PuterJune 23, 2009

‘Puter thinks that there’s one thing and one thing only that could make ABC’s visual mash note to President Obama’s health care agenda tolerable. Have Jake Tapper, and maybe John Stossel, run the entire interview. These two gentlemen would certainly … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Socialized Medicine

Come for the Jonahlanche, stay for the cabaret!

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

Welcome, NRO readers! And thanks for the link, Mr. G! Poke around, enjoy our unique blend of bloviation, nonsense, and globe-spanning fiendish plots I’m Confucius, the Gormogons’ Œcumenical Volgi. My partners in world domination here at Castle Gormogon are, in … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica, Jonah Goldberg

Health Benefits of Paying Taxes

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by The MandarinJune 23, 2009

In this article on Human Events.com, Jed Babbin discusses a proposal by Senator Max Baucus (D-MT) that would exempt union members and their families from paying the new proposed tax on employer provided healthcare benefits. It is incredible that 7% … Continue reading →

Posted in Card Check, Employee Free Choice Act, Socialized Medicine, Unions

ObamaCare

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by 'PuterJune 23, 2009

President Obama held a news conference today to backtrack on his Iran policy. In addition to abandoning his chosen course on Iran, President Obama also discussed his health care reform agenda. President Obama stated that Medicare and Medicaid are unsustainable … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Socialized Medicine

Government Motors

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by 'PuterJune 23, 2009

What fresh government Hell is this? President Obama is creating an Orwellian sounding White House Council on Automotive Communities and Workers. And that silver-tongued orator Vice President Biden will be rolling it out in Ohio today. Here’s a tip for … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Big Government

Cyber threats

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by GorTJune 23, 2009

UPDATE: Fixed missing link The Volgi pointed me at this column (opinion piece? article? Sometimes it’s hard to tell in the WaPo). I began to reply via the covert Gormogon network but I figured why not enlighten our readers as … Continue reading →

Posted in Cyberwarfare, Gormogonica

A shot at the very foundations of the Islamic Republic

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

If the protests fail, this guy’s on the short list for a bullet in the head if he ever goes back: “The principle of Velayat e-Faqih is neither intuitively obvious nor rationally necessary,” Mr. Kadivar wrote. “It is neither a … Continue reading →

Posted in Iran, Velâyet-e Fâqih

6b 6c 61 61 74 75 20 62 61 72 61 64 61 20 6e 69 6b 74 6f

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 23, 2009

The Mandarin says it’s like trying to nail jello to a tree. One assumes he may have done such a thing. The Czar has not, but agrees in theory: the more the Iranian government tries to suppress access to the … Continue reading →

Posted in Democracy, Iran, Technology, way too much technology

Insane Middle-Eastern Conspiratorialism: Persian Division

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

Great piece by the often-deranged Christopher Hitchens. He’s dead right, incidentally. Britain was the grand villain in Middle Eastern conspiracy theory until the ’70s, when the U.S. largely took over. But that doesn’t mean the Queen and the rest of … Continue reading →

Posted in Conspiracy theories from Saturn, Great Britain, Iran

Talk about inflation

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

Iran’s charging families three grand for the bullet that killed their kid. (The family doesn’t get the bullet—they get the body.) Back in the old days, the Chinese bullet fee (子弹费) was only $38. The Chinese must be kicking themselves. … Continue reading →

Posted in Bullet Fee (子弹费), China, Iran

Cookie pushers push cookies at Iranian government. Literally.

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

Ladies & Gentlemen, your Department of State: WASHINGTON (AFP) — The United States said Monday its invitations were still standing for Iranian diplomats to attend July 4 celebrations at US embassies despite the crackdown on opposition supporters.President Barack Obama’s administration … Continue reading →

Posted in Appearance of Weakness, Department of State, Fallacy of Foreign-Political Egocentrism, Iran, Mmm…barbecue…

Intel reform: Obama stirring up a hornet’s nest?

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

Looks like he’s got his own law-enforcement-paradigm intel reform up his sleeve. And the big loser? The CIA. Prepare for big-time bureaucratic war. The Obama administration is preparing a grand downgrading of the Central Intelligence Agency’s lead role in the … Continue reading →

Posted in CIA, Foreign Policy, Intelligence Community, Law Enforcement

S.E. Cupp: Boxer & the General

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 23, 2009

She rips Boxer apart over the same ’70s lunatic dinosaur feminism that the Volgi & Czar did: …The venomous brand of feminism that cuts men off at the knees to make women arbitrarily taller is no longer credible. When Boxer … Continue reading →

Posted in Feminism, GWAR, Jonah Goldberg, Red Eye, S.E. Cupp, SENATOR Boxer

Tele-Tubbies

The Gormogons Posted on June 23, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 23, 2009

One of the Czar’s messengers thought it necessary to interrupt his Pandora listening of Neil Sedaka with a news report about a Romanian teenager, Maria Barbu, who evidently electrocuted herself while twittering in the bathtub. “Pictures or it didn’t happen, … Continue reading →

Posted in Bathing, Electricity, Hygiene, Safety, Twitter

Who says the military has no sense of humor?

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 22, 2009

The item in question: The names of the USAF’s first four Reapers. They are named Conquest, War, Famine and Death, after the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. “For the Americans, the Book of Revelations wins out every time”, Brookes said. … Continue reading →

Posted in Apocalypse now, UAVs, USAF

Speaking of credit where it’s due.

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 22, 2009

How about Pixar’s performing corporal and spiritual works of mercy? Laudable! Exemplary! Just really frickin’ great. Dona ei requiem, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat ei. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Pixar rules, Up, Works of Mercy

Caveat Emptor

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by The MandarinJune 22, 2009

The NRA-ILA has recently sent out a Grassroots Alert detailing the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives’ efforts to question gun owners in states bordering Mexico regarding recent purchases. Their reasoning for the inquiries was that the weapons purchased … Continue reading →

Posted in BATFE, Gun control, Gun Ownership, Mexico, NRA, Pastry, Twinkies

Dionne and The Bon Mots

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by 'PuterJune 22, 2009

They’re nowhere near as good as Dion and the Belmonts. ‘Puter usually can’t figure out what E.J. Dionne, columnist for the Washington Post, is attempting to say, and today is no exception. Mr. Dionne opines that President Obama is a … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, E.J. Dionne

A Gilded Cage is Still a Cage

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by The MandarinJune 22, 2009

Here is a great article from Human Events Online that critiques a Mark Steyn article from the April 2009 edition of Imprimus. What I found most interesting is this quote from the article: Mark Steyn provides us with a historical … Continue reading →

Posted in Freedom, Government Control, Socialism, Socialized Medicine

Ha! Gitalong! Ha Gitalong! Working for the clampdown!

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 22, 2009

Rico Suave Lowry makes a very good point: 2) It may be that what we are witnessing here is a devilishly shrewd and effective crackdown, featuring a technological clampdown, targeted arrests at night, and brutality that falls shorts (for now) … Continue reading →

Posted in China, Iran

Re: حخاب

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 22, 2009

The Czar is correct. The veiling of women is actually an early-islamic syncretization of a Byzantine custom. There’s no basis for it in theology, but it is deeply acculturated in many parts of the Islamic world. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask … Continue reading →

Posted in Islam, Women

Obama wants the mullahs to win…

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 22, 2009

…because he’s more sympathetic to them than the people. So argues Andy McCarthy: It’s a mistake to perceive this as “weakness” in Obama. It would have been weakness for him to flit over to the freedom fighters’ side the minute … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Iran, Leftism

حجاب هببه هبه (Hijab Hubba Hubba)

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 22, 2009

No doubt many conservative, or pseduo-conservative, folks will be lauding Nicolas Sarkozy’s declared that burqu’s (burkhas) have no place in France as they are a clear celebration of the subjugation of women. The Czar is quite uneasy with this. Perhaps … Continue reading →

Posted in France, Islam

Systemic risk

The Gormogons Posted on June 22, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 22, 2009

Rather than waiting until the next cascade is imminent, and then following the usual modus operandi of propping up the handful of firms that seem to pose the greatest threat, it may be time for a new approach: preventing the … Continue reading →

Posted in Complexity, Socialized Medicine, Systems Analysis

Happy Fathers’ Day

The Gormogons Posted on June 21, 2009 by 'PuterJune 21, 2009

From the Gormogons to our readers.   And to our heathen friends, happy summer solstice. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this. … Continue reading →

Posted in Fathers Day

Good News For Your Gormogons

The Gormogons Posted on June 21, 2009 by 'PuterJune 21, 2009

‘Puter particularly was pleased to see that the Japanese have finally scientifically established superiority of the Gormogons’ chosen lifestyle. Chubby people unite! Post 1,700. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law … Continue reading →

Posted in Health care, Obesity

Englishmen will ne’er be slaves!

The Gormogons Posted on June 21, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 21, 2009

Except to the welfare state apparently. You know, we bitch about defense cuts, but we’re comparatively lucky… Army faces biggest cuts since Crimea Caption: Sergeant McGregor, Scots Fusilier Guards (possibly this guy), is ticked. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions … Continue reading →

Posted in British Army, Crimean War, Defense spending, RAF, Royal Navy, Rule Britannia

We’ve gone green.

The Gormogons Posted on June 21, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 21, 2009

In support of the revolutionaries in Iran. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Iran

Iran: Get smarter with Reuel Gerecht.

The Gormogons Posted on June 21, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 21, 2009

Here in the Standard. Here in the NYT. Mr. Gerecht notes that “Command the good; forbid the evil,” has been the religious-ideological justification for the “Islamic Republic.” One wonders if the ḥadîth, “My community will never agree upon an error,” … Continue reading →

Posted in Iran, Islam, Reuel Marc Gerecht

Barack Obama! He’s Come to Save the Day!

The Gormogons Posted on June 21, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 21, 2009

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today! Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Barack Obama, Humor

Obama & Iran: Better

The Gormogons Posted on June 21, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 21, 2009

Stronger statement today. Still a little timid for your Volgi who thinks we can be more forthright without coming across as manipulative or “meddling.” But credit where it’s due: moving belatedly in the right direction. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Iran

Gormogonica For Sale

The Gormogons Posted on June 20, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 20, 2009

As you know, and as you keep asking, is there anything we have for sale? Maybe. Meantime, we have a few of these left: the HK-HK (Hello Kitty) submachine guns, chambered for 9mm. Roller-locked delayed blowback, and 800 rpm cyclic … Continue reading →

Posted in GormogoniCon 2009

So Much To Read

The Gormogons Posted on June 20, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 20, 2009

Well, in between your Volgi’s Rémi Brague recommendation and GorT’s 25-page treatise on Euclidean geomtery, the Czar is not quite sure how to handle the reading workload. Ah yes, a suggestion from ‘Puter! The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Infighting

A different view on math in school

The Gormogons Posted on June 20, 2009 by GorTJune 20, 2009

In some of my readings this week, I came across this paper (click for PDF). It’s 25 pages long, but thouroughly enjoyable – at least to me. I think many of his points ring true. Having been through the progression … Continue reading →

Posted in Geometry, Math class is hard, Science, Teaching

Re: Re: Re: Poor Boy (redux)

The Gormogons Posted on June 20, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 20, 2009

The Czar appreciates your Volgi’s confidence in his analysis of the Senator Boxer (evidently a lightweight) discussion. The Czar does not disagree with ‘Puter’s main point, though: this is something being stretched out of proportion to the one and only … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter's Always Right, Politeness, SENATOR Boxer

Mind the Furniture Store

The Gormogons Posted on June 20, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 20, 2009

Right. Well, as you know, GorT sent a message to the world by deliberately causing the Kaguya probe to crash into the surface of the Moon as a demonstration of our power. JAXA, Japan’s version of NASA (except they seem … Continue reading →

Posted in Google, In English Please, Japanese language, Moon, Science

’Puter: Wrong! The correct answer is 134. 134. Issue number 6: what did you have for breakfast today?

The Gormogons Posted on June 20, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 20, 2009

Ok, given that Ghettoputer is staking out his ground as the all-seeing, all-loving, all-beneficent, Stuff White People Like® Gormogon lately, the Volgi must rule he’s dead wrong on Barbara Boxer and the general. Twice. And the Czar is right. The … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter ain't always right, Politeness, SENATOR Boxer

Busy day

The Gormogons Posted on June 20, 2009 by GorTJune 20, 2009

I almost overlooked this hallmark moment today as efforts are afoot behind the scenes here at the Gormorgons. This is exactly the point I was debating (with myself, maybe) in previous posts concerning NASA’s future: maybe it’s a better idea … Continue reading →

Posted in NASA, Space

How You Do It

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 19, 2009

Iran rips Britain, and Britain rips ‘em right back. See, State Department? That’s how you send a message to the protestors. Promising that Twitter will stay open extra late doesn’t do it. And BBC Persia? Great idea to help inspire … Continue reading →

Posted in England, Gordon Brown, Iran, United Kingdom

In The Navy!

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by 'PuterJune 19, 2009

Back to uncontroversial topics, like gays in the military. The Gormogons are split on the topic of integrating openly gay servicemen into the armed forces, and good arguments exist on both sides of the issue. ‘Puter advocates for inclusion. At … Continue reading →

Posted in Gays, Military

Happy Juneteenth! (But keep an eye on the Man.)

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 19, 2009

On the occasion of “Juneteenth,” the oldest and most recognized annual commemoration of the end of slavery in the United States, members of the Project 21 black leadership network suggest the civil rights-themed holiday be used to celebrate freedoms that … Continue reading →

Posted in Juneteenth, Liberty

Re: Re: Poor Boy

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by 'PuterJune 19, 2009

‘Puter hates defending crazy liberal Democrat senators (the cognitive dissonance makes his brain hurt), but here goes again. Sen. Barbara Boxer (D-CA) is being pressured by conservatives to apologize to Army General Michael Walsh. As a recap, Sen. Boxer insisted … Continue reading →

Posted in SENATOR Boxer

Navy Showdown?

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 19, 2009

FoxNews just went with this story, which the Czar does not see on other news feeds yet, that the dramatically-named USS John McCain is closing in on a North Korean ship believed to be moving weapon material around. The destroyer, … Continue reading →

Posted in China, North Korea, U.S. Navy, USS John McCain

And Now, US Attorney General Mills? (updated!)

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 19, 2009

The Obama administration is like a paranoid whackjob’s dream come true. How much government intrusion into daily lives is possible? Well, how about your breakfast cereal, товарищ? According to the new FDA, Cheerios is making misleading health claims that may … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Breakfast Cereal, FDA

Health Care Is Not A Right

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by 'PuterJune 19, 2009

‘Puter will say it again: health care is not a right. This must be the starting point for conservatives in discussing health care. It explains the difference between liberal and conservatives on President Obama’s “Government Knows What’s Best For You” … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Health care

Another Lesson

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by GorTJune 19, 2009

This time in understanding the size and scope of the federal budget and POTUS Obama’s claim that in 90 days his team will find $100 Million to cut. Kudos to the creator of this clip – very well done. GorTGorT … Continue reading →

Posted in Federal Budget, The Obama Amateur Hour

Happy Fathers’ Day!

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by 'PuterJune 19, 2009

‘Puter would like to personally thank American Idol runner up David Archuleta’s father James Archuleta for his great Fathers’ Day gift idea. Really, what father wouldn’t want a gift certificate for a “massage” in a pair of lace panties at … Continue reading →

Posted in American Idol, Fathers Day

Rémi Brague

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 19, 2009

Spectacular interview with the Sorbonne professor of Cyclopean erudtion on the occasion of his Legend of the Middle Ages. Bears re-reading several times. Buy the book. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Christianity, Civilization and Barbarism, Islam, Judaism, Middle Ages, Religion, Remi Brague, Unam sanctam catholicam apostolicam ecclesiam

More Power

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by GorTJune 19, 2009

It looks like people do read our posts or maybe we just screamed loud enough about the embarrassing side of Dr. Chu’s policies. The Department of Energy and the Nuclear Regulatory Commission (NRC) have selected four companies to assist in … Continue reading →

Posted in Nuclear power (more now please)

Maybe he’ll fire the FBI too?

The Gormogons Posted on June 19, 2009 by GorTJune 19, 2009

Looks like this Judge Walpin issue won’t be going away anytime soon. So much for “Hope & Change”, right? This has the stink of dirty politics all over it. There will be a misstep coming soon…mind where you heard it. … Continue reading →

Posted in Politics, The Obama Amateur Hour

Aw, we’re flattered.

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 18, 2009

But we rock much harder. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

Continue reading →
Posted in Bones, Gormogonica, Humor, This TV show really sucks

Gay Pride Parade

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by 'PuterJune 18, 2009

‘Puter’s going to get heretical here, and expects to be roundly beaten down by his Gormogon brethren (and, maybe if we can find women who can stand us some day, sistren). Here goes. ‘Puter thinks the Republicans should introduce legislation … Continue reading →

Posted in Gays, Republicans

Re: Poor Boy

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 18, 2009

God, we love ‘Puter, especially when he is always right. The Czar agrees that conservative talk radio is making too much of Senator Barbara Boxer’s request of BG Walsh. Bigger fish to fry, people! However, this exchange nevertheless gnaws at … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter's Always Right, Military, SENATOR Boxer, Sonia Sotomayor

Mailbag!

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by 'PuterJune 18, 2009

‘Puter got email from two Gormogons readers today, and is tickled pink. Each correspondent got a reply, along with a coupon for a free cheese and sausage sampler from Hickory Farms. Of course, the email was received in mid-May, but … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

The Boys of Summer

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 18, 2009

Ah yes, baseball is back, and so are steroid abuse allegations. In baseball’s worst-kept secret, Sammy “Say It Ain’t” Sosa (thanks to the Chicago Sun-Times for that gem of a pun) has been named as a player who tested positive … Continue reading →

Posted in Doping, Talkin' Baseball, Unions

Learn Something New Every Day

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 18, 2009

Article II—The Executive Branch Section 2 – Civilian Power over Military, Cabinet, or Anything The President shall be Commander in Chief of the Army and Navy of the United States, and of the Militia of the several States, and due … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Constitutional Law

Breaking: Sun Rises In The East

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by 'PuterJune 18, 2009

And ‘Puter is still always right. Taking its lead from The Gormogons, ABC News has taken notice of people claiming polyamory to be a civil right, a la gay marriage. As ‘Puter said, once you redefine a bedrock societal construct … Continue reading →

Posted in Gay Marriage, Polyamory

Terrible Headline

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 18, 2009

Ew. President Wades Into Gay Issues WaPo, no shame? The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Gays

I Am Just A Poor Boy, And My Story’s Seldom Told

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by 'PuterJune 18, 2009

Sen. Barbara Boxer (D-CA) chastised a brigadier general for referring to her as “ma’am” rather than “Senator” during a Senate hearing on New Orleans’ levee system yesterday. Some conservative voices have been decrying Sen. Boxer’s action. ‘Puter saw the footage … Continue reading →

Posted in SENATOR Boxer

Re: Obama: We Knew He Was Bloodthirsty

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by 'PuterJune 18, 2009

‘Puter’s back. His TRS-80 has been down with the swine flu (H1N1 for you PC media types), and the external cassette drive needs replacing. The Czar correctly notes below the moonbattery that is PETA. However, to be fair, one of … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, PETA

Obama & Iran: Good piece by Steve Hayes

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 18, 2009

Over at the Standard. Under President Obama, our approach to Iran–the world’s foremost state sponsor of terror, a rogue regime racing toward nuclear capability–is not only not regime change, it’s de facto regime preservation. So he delicately sought to say … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Diplomacy, Iran, Steve Hayes

If you read only one American pundit on Iran…

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 18, 2009

…make it Reuel Gerecht. He’s by far the most knowledgeable American writer out there with a profound understanding of the intelligence, military, cultural, and political context. His best guess: HH: Now this is Wednesday. Of course it’s now deep into … Continue reading →

Posted in CIA, Coups-Coups, Diplomacy, Iran, Reuel Marc Gerecht

Obama: We Knew He Was Bloodthirsty!

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 18, 2009

Oh no! Now Obama went and killed a living creature right on television, and laughed about his superiority. PETA is quite unhappy. All 12 of their supporters are no doubt voting Republican in 2012. Look on the bright side: George … Continue reading →

Posted in Animal Attacks, Barack Obama, Hunting

We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming for this message from the President

The Gormogons Posted on June 18, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 18, 2009

A Special Message to the People of Iran By Barack ObamaPresident of the United States Greetings. As president of United States — or, if you prefer, the Great Satan — I have have been following with keen interest the vigorous … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Humor, Iowahawk, Iran

Raptor still aloft?

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 17, 2009

Via Mike Goldfarb at the Standard, a WSJ piece showing the awesome power of a boldfaced Gormogon footnote. A House committee threw a wrench in the Obama administration’s plans to end Lockheed Martin Corp.’s F-22 Raptor fighter program, voting instead … Continue reading →

Posted in Australia, Defense spending, F-22, Israel, Japan

Pimpin’ ain’t easy, #7

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 17, 2009

Thanks for the kind words on GorT’s “paint the world” opus, Bore Patch. You be happy to know that the Gormogons are reasonably well armed. Though we could always use more. Send guns and money. (Lawyers enough we got.) Enjoy … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica, Guns, Warren Zevon

Let It Go, Already!

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by The Czar of MuscovyJune 17, 2009

Wow. The Czar surprises himself sometimes. A short while back, the Czar anticipated that some Democrats would link the Iranian elections to the 2000 US Presidential election. On a whim, and some prodding by the Mandarin, the Czar googled iran … Continue reading →

Posted in Al Gore, Iran, It Must Be Bush's Fault, Vote Fraud

Coup d’état! Coup d’état! Coup d’état!

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 17, 2009

What, no one else listened to the Repo Man soundtrack? Anyway, from Michael Totten over at Contentions, here’s more towards the theory that a Khâmene’î/Ahmadî-Nezhâd/IRGC coterie may have seized power within the government of Iran. His Kurdish correspondent seems quite … Continue reading →

Posted in Ali Khamenei, Coups-Coups, Iran, Mahmūd Ahmadî-Nezhâd

Unforeseen Development! Supplication slapped down as impotence… Redux! [Updated]

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 17, 2009

We got your “not meddling” right here, buddy. (Savor that Reuters headline, too.) Man, if only there had been some precedent that would have allowed them to foresee this eventuality.* Let your Œc. Vol. be the first to state, incidentally, … Continue reading →

Posted in Appearance of Weakness, Fallacy of Foreign-Political Egocentrism, Iran, Supplication Slapped Down

We’re Not Stealing, We’re Borrowing

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by The MandarinJune 17, 2009

Yesterday evening, my son was watching Walt Disney Studios’ 1973 release of Robin Hood on DVD. What caught my attention was this bit of dialog between Robin Hood and Little John at the beginning of the movie: (Little John) You … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, National Debt, Robin Hood, Stimulus Package, TARP

Iran: Don’t Believe the Hype. (And, Yo! Bum Rush the Show!) [Updated]

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 17, 2009

…what stuns me about the commentary over the last couple of days is the perception that the regime has done something shocking with this election. The regime isn’t any different today than it was the day before the election, the … Continue reading →

Posted in Diplomacy, Iran, Naïveté, Nukes, What is to be done?

The Gormogons’ tentacles reach to Tjicistan [sic]

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.June 17, 2009

Thanks very much to the Emir of TJICistan for the very kind words. We’d pimp your blog, but we’re already on that. Rahmat, homey. Oh, and courtesy of the Emir, here’s an interesting bit on Bruce Springsteen, Man of the … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica

Space Debate

The Gormogons Posted on June 17, 2009 by GorTJune 17, 2009

As the pinch gets put on the federal budget (hopefully) and maybe in part to help fund the soon-to-be-broadcasted ABC State Run News coverage infomercial of the Obama healthcare plan, various other agency budgets are getting trimmed or frozen at … Continue reading →

Posted in Get Your Ass to Mars, Space

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About Us

A secret society dedicated to the restoration of the Kingdom of Poland-Lithuania, the imprisonment of Esperanto speakers, and furthering the eschatological doctrine of the Return from Occultation of the Thirteenth Imam, Val Kilmer. Seriously, what happened to that guy? He was awesome in Tombstone. ایمام سیزدهم

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To contact your hosts and pledge your undying obedience, e-mail dr.j, gort, puter, theczar, themandarin or thenotoriousoev followed by the at sign, gormogons, then a ., and finally, com.

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